(Minghui.org) I am a female Falun Dafa disciple who lives in the countryside, and I am 61 years old. When I was young, I only completed the first year of elementary school, so I could only read a few simple characters.
Struggling to Survive
I got married at the age of 22. My parents-in-law didn’t like my husband or me, and my husband was not nice to me, either. Even when I was pregnant and wanted to eat an eggplant, my husband wouldn’t let me. My father-in-law, who was in his 40s at the time, had a bad temper, and would beat us or curse at us whenever he wasn’t in a good mood.
When I was giving birth to my first child, there was no transportation in the countryside to take me to the hospital, so a local midwife came and helped deliver the baby. After the baby was born, I caught a cold and fainted. My family invited a rural doctor to our home, who specialized in treating colds. He gave me an acupuncture treatment, and I came to. After that, I always felt a heavy weight pressing down on my shoulders, and frequently felt intense pain all over my body. Even so, much of the workload in my family still fell on me, including washing clothes, cooking, raising pigs, chickens, ducks, geese, and dogs, and doing the farm work.
As a result of the poor condition and workload, I developed many illnesses at a young age. My husband often beat and berated me, and my life was really miserable. Then my father-in-law became upset and beat my husband very hard, so my husband left me and ran away. Later, I learned that my husband went to my parents’ home, which was 30 miles away. After my father-in-law learned that my husband ran away, he violently beat me in front of my two young children. One child was less than one year old and the other was two years old. He hit me so hard with a broom that it broke into pieces. He then picked up an iron pot to hit me. He was really going to beat me to death. I was very thin and weak, and I couldn’t defend myself. I believed that I was going to die.
Just then, I suddenly thought, “I can’t die!” I didn’t know where the strength came from. My father-in-law was in his 40s and very strong, but somehow I pushed him aside and ran desperately to the village office. A village official and his wife were there, and I told them who I was. His wife saw how badly I was beaten, and she cried. The official was very upset, and wanted to send me to the hospital. But I was worried about my two young children. I was afraid that my father-in-law would take his anger out on them and even kill them. So I asked the official to help me get the children out. He said, “I will go with you. I will definitely seek justice for you.”
When we got to my home, my father-in-law tried to beat me again. The official cursed at him and threatened to take him to the police station. My father-in-law became afraid and ran away. My two children were scared and hungry, and cried very hard when they saw me. Since then, the two children were easily frightened. Because of the anger and hatred I had inside, my health continued to decline.
Gaining a New Life by Practicing Falun Dafa
In 1998, Dafa practitioners from other villages came to our village to introduce Falun Dafa. A good friend of mine began to practice Dafa first, and then asked me to learn it. I asked her, “Can this help me get rid of my resentment?” She said it could do anything. Since I could read only a few characters, it was very difficult for me to study the Fa. But even so, Master still helped purify my body in a short period of time. I was truly free of illness and my body was very light! I finally felt that I was alive again and saw hope in life!
However, in July 1999, Jiang Zemin, former leader of the Chinese Communist Party (CCP), began to defame Falun Dafa and persecute Dafa practitioners. I lost the environment to study the Fa and do the exercises with other practitioners. My husband and I left our village to find work. It wasn’t until 10 years later that we finally settled down in another place. During these 10 years, I could not see or hear any positive news about Falun Dafa. All I saw and heard were lies from the CCP. After settling down in the new environment, I was eager to find practitioners. With Master’s help, I soon had an environment for group Fa-study again. I also saw the lectures Master published, and understood that Dafa disciples should study the Fa, do the exercises, send forth righteous thoughts, and clarify the truth to save people.
I felt that I had greatly fallen behind in cultivation, so I tried to study the Fa a lot at home after finishing the housework. When I came across characters that I couldn’t read, I asked my children for help or asked practitioners at the Fa study site. The practitioners patiently taught me to read the characters. With Master’s help and that of fellow practitioners, I was soon able to read Zhuan Falun. After that, I was also able to read Master’s other lectures.
Eliminating Resentment
Since cultivating Dafa, I held myself to the principles of Truthfulness, Compassion, and Forbearance. I was able to let go of my hatred toward my parents-in-law, and I treated them well from my heart. My mother-in-law had two major illnesses, and I took great care of her. She said from the bottom of her heart, “Cultivating Dafa really made you a great person. If you hadn’t taken care of me like this, I would have died.”
I often visited my parents-in-law, asked them what they needed, brought them food and clothing, and helped them with housing and transportation needs. Sometimes my husband even scolded me, saying, “They treated you so badly before. Why are you still so good to them?!”
Once, my father-in-law said to me with guilt, “I was not nice to you in the past, but you still care about me so much. Even if you divorce my son, I will still contact you for anything.” Before I started to cultivate, my husband and I almost divorced.
My husband always spoke harshly and never knew how to care for others. Even though he was in his 60s, he still beat me and cursed at me. I was unable to maintain my xinxing, and often argued with him. I deeply resented him and often felt wronged. When I complained about this to my daughter, she said, “Without my father creating tribulations for you, can you cultivate to Buddhahood?”
My little grandson, who was a few years old, also said the same thing to me. I realized that Master was hinting to me through their mouths, so I made up my mind to maintain my xinxing and cultivate amidst the tribulations with my husband. But it was easier said than done! I often cried because I failed to maintain my xinxing.
Around the last Chinese New Year, he was angry and pinched my arms near the armpits with both hands. He was tall and strong, and the pain was unbearable. After that, I couldn’t lift my right arm, which made me unable to properly do the Falun Dafa exercises.
I knew that this was caused by my karma. I kept looking inward, and sought to make benevolent resolutions with him, just as Master talked about. But it never seemed to work, and I didn’t know why. When I was looking inward once, I suddenly understood: It was because I hadn’t let go of my resentment to my husband, which led to my lack of righteous thoughts. I didn’t think I could reach consummation with this resentment, and reaching consummation was obviously needed for the benevolent resolution to be successful. I sent out a firm thought, “I have Master and Dafa. I will definitely be able to achieve Consummation.”
I silently recited Master’s Fa for making a benevolent resolution, and I asked to seek a benevolent resolution with my husband. After a while, I felt an itch in my right ear, and naturally raised my right hand to scratch it. Then, I realized that I was able to lift my right arm, which had troubled me for nearly 10 months!
Breaking Through Human Thoughts
I am not good at expressing myself. Sometimes I understand things in my heart, but I cannot put them into words. When I saw practitioners talking about their understandings of the Fa principles and sharing their experiences of face-to-face truth-clarification, I was really envious. I was anxious and didn’t know what I could do. Then I realized that while talking to people is difficult, I have my hands and feet, and I can go out to distribute truth-clarification materials. I have since then been doing exactly that for more than 10 years. Even the pandemic did not stop me from going out to help Master save people.
Every day, I have to cook and do the housework for three families: my own and my two adult children’s families. I also help take care of my grandchildren in both families. I then study the Fa, send forth righteous thoughts, ask Master to help me, and then go out with a very calm mind to distribute materials. When I go to residential buildings and houses, there were many times when people came out just as I was about leave the materials on their doors. I would smile and tell them, “I am bringing you blessings. Please take a look.” Most people would take them.
During the pandemic, the residential communities were under lockdown, and security guards were at the gates. But with Master’s help, I was always able to enter the communities and distribute the materials without any issues. I actually distributed more materials than usual during the pandemic. It was because I had a sense of urgency to save people, worried that people were starting to be eliminated.
I also encountered many miracles when I was distributing materials. However, due to my poor enlightenment quality, I usually did not realize it was our great and compassionate Master encouraging me until later. Here are just two examples.
One night, I was chased by someone while distributing materials. After that, I was too scared to go out at night again. However, after my youngest grandson was born, I needed to take care of him during the day, so I could only go out at night. That was also during the pandemic, and practitioners had different opinions on distributing materials during this period. Some felt it would not be effective, because people might worry about viruses and not take the materials home. Others also told me they had seen police who went to check the surveillance cameras in the community where I had just distributed materials. This made me even more afraid. But just then, fellow practitioners sent another large bag of materials to me. I was very hesitant and didn’t know what to do. I randomly picked up a copy of Minghui Weekly and started reading it. A passage of Master’s Fa appeared. It was aimed precisely at my confusion. After reading it, my righteous thoughts were strengthened. I said to Master, “Master, I understand now. I will go out to save people.”
Every time I posted a truth-clarification brochure that night, I saw a golden light flash in front of me. I thought, “Why is there so much static today?” When I got home, I realized that this was Master encouraging me! What was even more amazing was that after returning home, I picked up the Minghui Weekly and wanted to read that Fa passage again, but I couldn’t find it. I was sure of what page it was on, but I just could not find it. I then read through itfrom beginning to end but still couldn’t find it. Only then did I realize that it was something from Master. I was extremely excited, and I put my hands together in front of my chest to sincerely thank Master for his compassionate enlightenment.
Another day, after sending righteous thoughts at noon, I was on my way out to distribute materials. Then my son-in-law called me. He said that a residential community was doing nucleic acid tests and asked me to go there to take one. This community was exactly the one I was planning to go to. I thought, “Isn’t this interference? Should I still go? Yes, I should! Master is always by my side, and I am doing the most righteous thing!”
I went there, and saw a miraculous scene. When I got to the first building, the residents there were lining up outside to do the nucleic acid test, and no one was in the building. When I finished distributing materials in that building, people were done with the tests and began to go back inside. I then went to the next building, and exactly the same thing happened. No one was there, and they started to go back inside just as I had finished. Then the next building was exactly the same. This continued until I finished distributing all the materials. I could not express my feeling in words, and was so grateful to Master for his compassionate protection!
Master’s arrangements are always the best. I thanked Master again and again when I returned home.
These have been my personal experiences. If anything in my understanding isn’t in accordance with the Fa, please kindly point it out.
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