(Minghui.org) Throughout my 20 years of cultivation, I have experienced the joy of obtaining the Fa, the pain that comes from letting go of attachments, and the easing of mind and body after elevating in levels. Not only has my body been purified, but my character has also improved after overcoming tribulations. I have changed from being a selfish person, to being a more open-minded individual. Even my relatives and friends agree that I have changed for the better.
I had a miserable childhood. My mother passed away when I was seven, and my father remarried that same year in autumn. My misfortunes began the moment my stepmother arrived at our home. My stepmother would restrain herself before my father and mistreat me the moment he left. She would find issues where there were none, in order to ruthlessly hit and scold me. After my stepmother gave birth to my two younger sisters and brother, her methods of torturing me escalated, as though she was out to kill me.
Food was withheld, and I was not spared even during the Chinese New Year celebrations. My parents and siblings would eat dumplings made of white flour while I ate those made from black flour. I was made to perform all kinds of work, either picking vegetables in the mountains, cutting grass, or doing household chores. My attendance in school was spotty as a result, because of the endless work waiting for me each day. I had no time to rest, and lived in fear of being beaten by my stepmother. I spoke softly, avoided other people, and spent my days feeling depressed.
Given my stepmother’s abuse, I suffered both physically and mentally. In my youth, I had a short, thin frame, and a gray complexion. The physical examination conducted on my first day at work found I weighed only 37 kilograms (82 pounds). Fellow factory workers commented, “This child is so small. She should be taken to a kindergarten.”
I dared not complain about my stepmother’s abuse, but the seeds of resentment grew in my heart. Whenever I saw her, my heart would involuntarily clench and the resentment I had suppressed would resurface, making it impossible for me to calm down. After I started working, I left home resolving to avoid my stepmother at all costs.
Obtaining the Fa and Repaying Debts
I started cultivating Falun Dafa at the behest of my kind colleague, not long after July 20, 1999, at the height of the Chinese Communist Party’s (CCP) persecution against Falun Gong (also called Falun Dafa).
After reading Zhuan Falun, the main book of Falun Dafa, for the first time, I knew it was a book that teaches people how to be good. At first, I thought to myself, “If my stepmother had read this book, she would not be so evil, and I would not have suffered so much.” But as I continued to read it I began to understand the deeper principles of karmic retribution, and that I was paying for the bad deeds I committed in my past lives. Perhaps I had harmed my stepmother or abused her in my past life, so in this life she had the right to claim this debt from me.
This understanding eliminated some of the resentment I felt towards my stepmother, and corrected my previous assumption that God was treating me unfairly. Debts must be repaid, and I was willing to repay them.
Some things are easier said than done. The process to remove this deep-rooted resentment was excruciating. Layer by layer, I repeatedly worked on removing this attachment, but my resentment would reemerge after a while. I desperately wanted to avoid my stepmother, as her vicious and immoral abuse still left my composure in tatters. But as a Falun Dafa practitioner, I had to do things according to the requirements of the Fa and let go of the past. Moreover, these interpersonal grudges were caused by my past transgressions. So, after avoiding my stepmother for many years, I changed my tone and began actively interacting with her. I bought gifts and visited my two elderly parents on New Years Day and other special occasions, thus fulfilling my responsibilities as their daughter. Over time, my resentment faded.
One day, my stepmother asked me to give her an allowance to support her in her old age. On hearing her request, I angrily blurted out, “You abused me, yet still dare to ask me to support you in your old age. I won’t give you a penny!” Later, she forced my father to try and approach me for money.
The day after this occurred, I saw my stepmother collecting scraps on the street and thought to myself, “She deserves it!” After having this evil thought, I was sick for three days. Later, I thought, “She is in her 60s, yet trying to make ends meet by collecting scraps. She should be pitied. I should not have gloated over her misfortune.” This incident made me realize my resentment was not completely gone, and I resolved to eliminate it completely.
I knew I was wrong. My response was a manifestation of evil and lacked compassion. Life remained hard for the elderly couple. Their three biological children cared little for them, and without financial support, they were forced to scrounge for scraps on the street to make a living. With no other options left, they had abandoned their self-respect to come knocking on my door, asking for money. Their situation was truly pitiful, so I decided to give them 2,000 yuan yearly. As our family was not well off, I was unable to provide them with more. After I told them not to collect scraps any longer, and gave them this sum of money, it felt as though a big stone had been lifted from my heart.
When my father passed away, he requested to be buried next to my mother. However, my stepmother and their three children fiercely opposed his decision. In the end, my maternal uncle presided over the burial of my father with my mother. Anger over their inhumane behavior prompted me to cease all contact with my stepmother, and I sent my son over in my stead with gifts during festivals.
Four or five years later, my stepmother came knocking on my door. She gave me some fruit and said she wanted to see how I was doing. When I pointed out my welfare was none of her business, she embarrassingly told me she was sick. I replied, “If you are sick, you should go visit the hospital.”
Two months later, her condition worsened and she was diagnosed with cancer. By then my hatred towards her had been gone, and I just felt pity for her. Her biological children were so focused on earning money that they abandoned her. Besides dropping off and picking up my granddaughter after school, I prepared food and drink for my stepmother, tidied up and took care of her, putting more effort than even her biological daughter.
One day, she cried and said to me, “If you didn’t come, I wouldn’t even have water to drink.” I could not help but cry with her. Later, my second aunt told me, “Before your stepmother died, she whispered to me, ‘I’m so fortunate to have this eldest daughter! She provided me with food, cleaned my home, and washed my face. I treated her so badly before, yet not only did she forgive me, she treated me well and helped me out.’”
My relatives were aware of my stepmother’s abuse. My second aunt asked me, “Don’t you hate her at all?” I replied, “Because I practice Falun Dafa, I got rid of my hatred for her. Now, I just feel sorry for her. I may have treated her badly in my previous life, and this is a debt I had to repay.” After listening to my words, my aunt seriously declared, “It seems that Falun Gong is not an ordinary practice. You mentioned it many times previously, but I didn’t take your words to heart. Today, after seeing your kind deeds, I finally believe you. I will follow your advice and renounce my CCP membership for me and your uncle.” When I told her my uncle must also agree with this decision, and to ask him after she returned home before withdrawing, my aunt reassured me that she was confident he would agree.
Changes in Body and Health
Before cultivating Dafa, I had a lump growing near my vocal cords. Specialists at several hospitals recommended surgery to have it removed but could not guarantee my vocal cord would be left undamaged. The threat of losing my voice caused me to postpone the surgery time and again. Yet after practicing Falun Dafa, the lump disappeared without a trace.
I had noticed since childhood that the anatomy of my ears was very different. Besides feeling numb, my right ear canal was very shallow. Unlike my left ear, I would reach inside only to feel a membrane blocking my access to the rest of the canal. One day I said to Master, “Master, if this is due to my karma, let me bear it. If not, please help me clean it up.”
One night, I dreamed a big hand reached into my mouth and tore away a piece of rotten meat. The following day, my ear started hurting and bleeding. Two days later, the pain worsened, which caused my head to feel swollen and painful. At this juncture, I used an ear pick and dug out from my right ear a piece of flesh, similar in appearance to the rotten meat that appeared in my dream. Afterwards, my right ear canal felt as unblocked as my left and healed on its own after bleeding for three days. I had suffered from constant migraines since childhood, and these migraines magically disappeared after my ear was healed. My body is now light and disease free, and my sallow complexion has been replaced with a rosy glow.
I have a relative who is a CCP member. I had explained to him the truth behind the persecution of Falun Gong many times, but never received his acceptance. One day, as I was trying to convince him again, he said, “You don’t have to say another word. Your improved physical health is enough to convince me. Your complexion used to be gray, but now you look completely healthy. Please help me quit the Party!” He also said, “In fact, what your Master teaches are identical to the wisdom passed down by the ancients. These teachings are true and I believe in them.”
Avoiding Danger with Master’s Protection
During my beginning cultivation phase, I got to know a fellow veteran practitioner. Officers working for the evil CCP tried to force this practitioner’s cooperation, to help brainwash other practitioners at brainwashing centers. However, this practitioner refused to cooperate, brought his Dafa materials over to my home for safekeeping, then hid himself away from the authorities.
Not long afterward, the 610 Office found out from telecommunications records that he had contacted me. Five or six police officers set out to search my home. Yet just as they approached my doorstep, my neighbor heard one of them say, “Isn’t it inappropriate for us to break into a person’s home just based on a single phone call? Let’s approach the leader of her work unit first.” They subsequently left without entering. If they had forcibly entered my home, they would have seen truth clarification fliers, CDs, and copies of the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party everywhere, in plain sight.
They later visited my workplace and interviewed leaders and colleagues from my work unit. Everyone said I was an honest, upright person, and claimed they had never heard about me practicing Falun Gong. In this way, I escaped persecution from the authorities. I was scared and shocked after hearing about this incident, but I was also moved. Master had protected me and resolved all danger.
Once, while clarifying the truth at a fair, a thief stole my backpack, which was hanging on my bicycle handlebars. Within the bag were truth clarification materials and my mobile phone. With my mobile phone, the thief maliciously reported me to the authorities as a Falun Dafa practitioner. When government personnel sought out my work unit leader to cooperate in the investigation, my work unit leader told them, “She retired many years ago. Nobody knows where her new home is. How shall we find her?” My work unit leader cleverly helped protect me, and the authorities soon dropped the matter.
Master has arranged my cultivation path and resolved all the dangers I encountered. I will continue to heed Master’s words, improve, save more sentient beings, and repay Master’s kindness.
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