(Minghui.org) Over the years, I met many Falun Dafa practitioners who developed “illness karma.” Some looked inward and overcame their tribulations, while others dragged along and continued to suffer. Practitioners who sought medical treatment may have temporarily removed the illness symptoms; but others lost their lives.
Jing and her husband moved here more than ten years ago. She was very diligent in cultivation and did the three things. She clarified the facts about Falun Dafa to people face to face every day and handed out informational materials wherever she went. She felt pretty good about her cultivation state.
However, in the summer of 2023, Jing experienced illness karma that manifested as leukemia, and her family took her to the hospital for treatment. After she came home, I visited her a few times and shared my thoughts with her. Sadly, she passed away not long after at the age of 77. I heard that before she passed away, she often wondered why she had to suffer from this sickness karma. She did things related to Dafa so well, yet her condition went from bad to worse.
I would like to share some realizations I had, and hopefully we can all draw some lessons to avoid unnecessary losses.
In November 2023, Jing’s younger sister (also a practitioner) asked me if I could take on the job of Primary Care Assistant (PCA) for Jing when she was discharged from the hospital. I agreed and we met at the hospital to discuss the specific duties and payment. We agreed that I would start in a week.
I went home and organized a few things to get ready for my job as Jing’s PCA. However, her two sons who work in the provincial capital arranged for her to get further treatment in a provincial hospital, and urged her to immediately transfer to that hospital. I was not told about this arrangement.
A week later, I went to Jing’s home to work as her PCA. She told me that she stayed only one day at the provincial hospital. After I cared for Jing for three days, her husband learned that two neighborhood committee staff were coming to their place to check up on something. He was a bit worried about the purpose of this visit, and told me to go home.
When I went to Jing’s place again, her condition had worsened. She was bedridden and could hardly eat anything. She also had pain all over her body. Her family hired a non-practitioner PCA, and her two sons took leave from work to be with her.
I encouraged her to keep firm faith in Master and the Fa, and said that as long as we keep improving our xinxing nothing can stop us. She had great difficulty speaking by then, but she still looked within and found many attachments she had yet to let go of. I also pointed out a few that she hadn’t been aware of, and she agreed with me.
I would like to share some of Jing’s main problems with fellow practitioners as she wished me to do:
1) She complained about Master. She thought that she'd practiced Falun Dafa for so many years and did a lot to validate the Fa. Why did she still have such a huge tribulation?
2) She didn’t study the Fa solidly and wholeheartedly and held onto attachments of resentment, anger, being cunning, jealousy, vanity, and dislike of being criticized. She also enjoyed her good financial situation and was often arrogant and superior towards other practitioners.
3) She looked down on her husband. She didn’t respect him and always complained about him to show her superiority. Whenever he did something she didn’t like, she shouted at him, whether it was at home or in a public place. She also forced her husband to do things he didn’t want to. Even though he didn’t argue with her, he felt extremely unbalanced inside. She often talked about him behind his back, saying that he was from a peasant family, was clumsy, and couldn’t do anything right. The fact is her husband was a professor and taught in a well-known university. After he retired, he did all kinds of household chores, and always sought advice from her in everything he did.
4) She could not let go of life and death. While in the hospital, when a patient in her ward passed away, she became fearful for her own life. An old man also suffered from leukemia. So she talked with his son, trying to learn more about the disease. Soon after, she also started to have pus and blood in her stool and urine. After she returned home, she told others that the old man with leukemia died, and said she felt her internal organs were failing and that she was dying. She often told her sister that she would be gone soon and asked Master to arrange for her to pass away sooner so that she wouldn’t suffer so much. How could Master help her when she already gave up herself?
5) She didn’t truly believe in Master and the Fa. She wanted to die and even thought of committing suicide. Her husband is 83 years old, and he wanted to buy a burial site in his hometown to place his ashes in after he died. She supported the idea and they planned to have their ashes buried together. Since then, she always felt that she would die and leave this world at any time. When she became very sick, she asked her son to supply her with medicine for a euthanasia injection. Jing also acquired sleeping pills from the community health service center with her husband’s ID card behind his back so that she could take them when she couldn’t bear the suffering. When I found out about this, I told her to throw the stuff away, but she refused. She asked her younger son to keep them for her.
She failed to pay attention to such dangerous thoughts, let alone send forth righteous thoughts to deny the old forces’ arrangement and eliminate the interference and this form of persecution. As a result, her condition went from bad to worse and she talked about death almost every day. It seemed she had no righteous thoughts at all. The other practitioners went to her house to send righteous thoughts to support her, but she couldn’t let go of those unrighteous thoughts, and kept talking about death.
She passed away in December, 2023, and the other practitioners felt very bad for her.
I learned a few things from this experience.
1) We must always look within as soon as sickness karma appears and check if we’ve done anything not in line with the Fa principles or said anything inappropriate. We should immediately rectify ourselves based on the Fa.
2) Reject negative thinking. Whenever a negative thought comes up, we must recognize it, and immediately eliminate it. The thought does not come from our true selves, and we must rectify our thinking. We must never lose our righteous thoughts or deal with the situation negatively.
Master said in Falun Gong,
“But there’s one thing about exercises that cultivate both mind and body: If when your life has been extended a character problem comes along, your life will immediately be in danger, for your life was extended for the purpose of cultivation. So once your character has problems your life will right away be in danger.” (Falun Gong)
It’s imperative that we cultivate every thought we have.
3) Firmly believe in Master and the Fa at all times. When the old forces attack our bodies in this dimension, their purpose is to make us lose faith in Master and Dafa so that they can crush us both spiritually and physically. At the critical moment, we must be clear headed and think: Everything about me was created and given by Master, and no other beings are worthy of intervening.
Master said in “Cultivation in Dafa Is Serious,”
“And so Master completely removed Dafa disciples’ names from the Three Realms, from the human world, and from the netherworld, including Hell. From that moment, Dafa disciples’ lives were governed by Dafa alone, and they would no longer enter into reincarnation, and even if they had committed sins, they would still not be governed by Hell.” (“Cultivation in Dafa Is Serious”)
We should maintain strong righteous thoughts and righteous faith in Master and Dafa. Master has the final say in everything. Master is rectifying the universe, and the old forces are also being rectified. No one can interfere with this. Master is omnipotent, and as long as we have strong righteous thoughts, the old forces cannot succeed in their schemes to take away our physical bodies, and the so-called tribulations will also disappear.
In addition, fellow practitioners who are suffering tribulations should always remember: I am Master Li Hongzhi’s disciple, and I will complete my entire cultivation path arranged by Master. No being is worthy of testing me. If I’ve done something wrong, I will rectify myself in the Fa. I ask compassionate Master to take control of everything. When you think this way, the old forces will be too scared to approach you.
4) Cherish life and never think of committing suicide. All Dafa practitioners understand how precious our physical body is. How can we practice cultivation without it? Even if you are in great physical pain, you should never think of giving up on yourself. Being a Dafa disciple is the envy of all the gods in the universe. The pain we suffer is actually caused by our own karma or failure to do well. We must never blame Master! It’s not that Master doesn’t care about you, but there are Fa principles in everything we do in the Fa-rectification, and gods and Buddhas must also act in accordance with heavenly principles. Master also needs to take care of all things in line with the Fa, and needs to see whether his disciples have strong righteous thoughts or not.
Master said in Zhuan Falun,
“You have been taught the principles and the Fa. Who can you blame if you still don’t want to improve yourself? With regard to what you want, both Falun and my fashen will not intervene—this is for sure.” (Lecture Six, Zhuan Falun)
I hope we can learn a lesson from this case. Doing things cannot replace cultivation. We should maintain righteous thoughts and deeds, study the Fa well and cultivate our xinxing while assisting Master in saving sentient beings. We must not disappoint Master, who is expecting us to succeed in cultivation. We must not fail because we are responsible for the sentient beings in our own heavenly paradise.
This is some of my shallow understanding. Please kindly point out anything improper.
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Category: Perspectives
