(Minghui.org) In 2001, my family moved from our hometown in the countryside of Shandong Province to a big city in Northeast China. I met my husband there. He, like me, is an introverted and quiet person, but exceptionally kind.
I stopped practicing Dafa when the persecution of Falun Dafa started, and all my illnesses returned. The torment of illnesses, coupled with the stress of running a small clothing shop, made me particularly bad-tempered, and I often lashed out at my husband. He never responded, and always listened quietly.
My parents’ rental house was to be demolished in 2009, so they came to stay with us. Soon after, my mother met a Falun Dafa practitioner on the street who talked to her about Falun Dafa and the persecution. Excited, she told the practitioner that we had also practiced before the persecution, but had since stopped, though we still believed in Dafa and wanted to reconnect.
When my mother later returned home, she told me that the practitioner suggested forming a Fa-study group at our home so we could reconnect with other Dafa practitioners. In preparation we got all the Falun Dafa books together.
I closed the clothing shop and stayed at home because I had to take care of my child. I then had ample time to read every one of Master Li’s lectures. The principles of Dafa were continually revealed to me, and I felt immense joy. Through extensive Fa-study, I learned the true purpose of life and understood why it’s essential to do the three things well, significantly elevating my xinxing.
I faced some tests after resuming cultivation. My kind and honest husband began to frequently lash out at me, verbally and physically. Initially, my extreme selfishness and strong self-protection made it hard for me to endure, even though I knew he was helping me improve. I often retaliated but regretted it afterward, crying in front of Master’s portrait. My child once came to me and said, “Mom, you’re crying, and I’m crying too.” I realized this was Master using my child’s words to enlighten me. I felt deep sorrow, knowing I had disappointed Master. I resolved to do better and study the Fa more to rectify myself.
I knew that some practitioners often visited the Minghui.org website, and I wanted to as well. However, we couldn’t afford a laptop, and the only computer we had was used by my husband. A practitioner suggested setting up two systems for me and my husband so we could share one computer, and wouldn’t interfere with each other. I discussed it with my husband, and he agreed.
A practitioner came to set up the system and asked if they could delete some items from the desktop. Not knowing much about computers, I said to delete anything unnecessary. My husband was furious after seeing his desktop items gone. He lashed out at me with harsh words. I knew this wasn’t coincidental. Master was giving me another opportunity to improve. I stayed silent, recognizing my fault.
My husband continued to yell while I sat with my child, finding it increasingly hard to endure. Master saw that I was having difficulty and used my child’s words to enlighten me again, “Mom, don’t say anything, dad is helping you.” Tears flowed as I silently apologized to Master and resolved to eliminate my selfishness. After a while, my husband stopped yelling.
My husband, who valued money highly, managed all our finances. It was always difficult for me to ask him for living expenses, as when I needed more, he would question how I would spend the money. Initially, I couldn’t bear it and often argued with him, feeling that he distrusted me, which led to resentment and disdain of him. Later, Master’s teachings resolved my grievances.
Master said:
“... one lives because of karmic retribution. If you owe someone something, he will find you for the repayment. If he takes too much, he will have to pay it back to you the next time around. If a son is not good to his parents, they will trade places the next time; this is how it cycles on and on.” (Lecture Six, Zhuan Falun)
After reading this, I understood that my husband’s behavior wasn’t without reason. Perhaps I treated others this way in a previous life. Realizing this, I let go of my resentment and hatred toward him.
All attachments stem from selfishness, and only by constantly eliminating selfishness can one remove various human attachments. Everyone who interacts with me is there to help me improve my character and elevate. As a true cultivator, I must accept everything, embrace everyone, continually look inward, and remove human attachments.
Master said:
“...whatever you do, you should consider others first, so as to attain the righteous Enlightenment of selflessness and altruism.” (“Non-Omission in Buddha-Nature” in Essentials for Further Advancement)
I now follow Master’s teachings in both work and family life, constantly improving my character, unconditionally looking inward, and assimilating to Dafa. I have greatly improved, both physically and mentally. As I changed, my surroundings also changed. My husband no longer yells at or hits me, and our home is now filled with harmony and happiness.
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Category: Improving Oneself
