(Minghui.org) I did not get along with my mother before I practiced Falun Dafa. We were like fire and water, and I always did the opposite of what she wanted. I resented her for not doing anything for our family, so I said hurtful things that made her cry.
After I began practicing Falun Dafa, I realized my actions didn’t conform to the principles of Truthfulness, Compassion, and Forbearance. Nonetheless the notions formed in the past continued to dominate me and I sometimes couldn’t control myself—but I always felt regretful after we fought.
As I continued to cultivate, I was able to be tolerant when conflicts arose between us, but only on the surface. In my mind I couldn’t stop arguing with her, which made me feel even worse.
When I looked within I realized I always argued about superficial issues based on my human notions instead of using them to improve myself based on the Fa. I didn’t treat her like someone I should save. When we had conflicts it was time for me to repay the karmic debt that I owed and improve. Instead of arguing with her I should have thanked her. When I enlightened to this I felt peaceful. I was able to look at my mother kindly and speak to her gently. I knew her life wasn’t easy. Our relationship improved.
One day my mother brought up things that happened long ago. She was angry and said hurtful things. I looked at her, and thought, “This is not my mother acting out. It’s the resentment she formed over the years, which is a living being that’s controlling her. But she doesn’t know it.” I felt sorry for her, and knew this happened so that I could improve my character. This time I didn’t argue with her.
Her actions also allowed me to realize that I had always made demands and judged her based on my notions. I often told her, “Why don’t you listen to me? If you did, this wouldn’t have happened.” The truth is, if she did everything I wanted I wouldn’t have any cultivation opportunities. When I realized this I felt so much compassion for her, and my resentment was gone. My mother calmed down, and it was as though nothing happened. Usually when she started acting out, she kept going all day, tormenting the both of us. I thanked Falun Dafa from the bottom of my heart.
My parents used to fight, and my mother viciously scolded my father. I often defended him with everyday people’s principles, and ended up intensifying their fights. Now, as a practitioner, I know that their conflicts occurred so they could repay their karmic debts. Wanting to protect my father from harm was my human notion, not the compassion of a cultivator. I let go of my human notions and I no longer get involved in their fights.
The three of us live together happily. There are few conflicts and my parents barely fight. They both now read Falun Dafa books. Thank you, Master Li.
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Category: Improving Oneself
