(Minghui.org) Influenced by the Chinese Communist Party’s (CCP) culture I developed a strong personality and ego. I’ve practiced Falun Dafa for 20 years and nearly all my cultivation tests involved my husband. He was mean and said hurtful things, and we frequently had conflicts over trivial matters because our opinions differed. He took advantage of these moments to make contemptuous and sarcastic remarks that were deeply hurtful. I sometimes argued with him; other times, I remained silent and endured it, but I still felt very angry inside.
Whenever I was in a bad mood, studying the Fa cleansed my thoughts, strengthened me, and helped me let go of my ego. This allowed me to move past the pain. However, when the next conflict happened all those negative thoughts resurfaced. I felt the pain all over again and struggled to extricate myself. Through consistently studying the Fa, looking inward, and letting go of my attachments, I was able to rise above the challenges. This process was repeated many times, but my determination to practice Falun Dafa never wavered.
Although I believe I understand Dafa’s principles well, when conflicts arise, I often rely on human thoughts to assess the situation first. My initial reaction is: “This is not my fault; it’s his, because he is unreasonable and self-centered.” When the conflicts escalated, I felt wronged and resentful. Afterward, I frequently reflected and looked inward, and I found many attachments, such as not accepting criticism, self-esteem, resentment, jealousy, a desire for fame and wealth, and the urge to protect myself. When I recognize these attachments, I make an effort to let them go.
One day, through studying the Fa and sharing cultivation experiences with other Falun Dafa practitioners, I realized that the old forces imposed notions on me, such as self-esteem, self-centeredness, and feeling disrespected by my husband. These notions were, in fact, false. I was trapped by these illusions while attempting to cultivate.
I started by acknowledging that I felt disrespected by my husband and that my self-esteem was hurt. Then, I began to explore how to let go of my self-esteem and other attachments. Was I following the path arranged by the old forces? Did I truly have those human thoughts and notions? I came to understand that they were not mine. I should not acknowledge them but instead reject and eliminate them.
As a practitioner, I should not be moved by worldly things. Later, when conflicts arose, I used Dafa’s principles of Truthfulness, Compassion, and Forbearance to guide my thoughts. With this change in mindset, the burden lifted, and I felt a sense of relief and freedom.
Changing one’s mindset is a crucial step in the cultivation process. During cultivation, we must be vigilant and capture every single thought, let go of human notions, and not be misled by the false appearances of ordinary people. When conflicts arise, our first thought should be to remember that we are practitioners, not ordinary people. Ordinary people’s thoughts often revolve around self-protection, while practitioners are guided by the universal principles of Truthfulness, Compassion, and Forbearance.
No matter what happens or whatever conflicts we encounter, we must think from the perspective of validating Dafa and saving people. My personal understanding is that true compassion means having empathy for all sentient beings, and recognizing their wish to be saved by Dafa. Every thought we have determines whether people are saved or eliminated. By walking the right path and cultivating ourselves well, we can help Master save more people. The responsibilities we bear as practitioners are immense.
Just as I finished writing this article, I felt a profound sense of peace and joy. It seemed as though everything around me—the sky, the earth, the flowers, the plants, and the trees—was changing. When I changed, my husband changed too. He began speaking in a gentle and peaceful tone. Thank you, Master! Thank you, Dafa!
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Category: Improving Oneself
