(Minghui.org) I had two huge karmic tests regarding family members, and I now realize Master was helping me repay my karmic debts I owe from past lives. Once I resolved these grievances, I felt relieved and my deep feelings of resentment went away.
Resentment Toward My Mother-in-law Finally Melts Away
My husband is the second of three sons and his parents did not treat them equally. When we married in 1991, his parents didn’t spend any money on our wedding. However, they spent a lot of money on their other sons’ weddings.
My mother-in-law came to help out when my child was born in 1995. I paid her and bought her all kinds of clothes, but she complained that I didn’t pay her enough for all her hard work. I disagreed and thought that she shouldn’t complain about the pay because she’d spent nothing on our wedding. This caused bad feelings between us. She then started badmouthing me to other family members, turning them against me. Although she’d only stayed at my home for a few months, it caused a deep-seated resentment.
I started practicing Dafa in 1998 and tried hard to be a good person. Two months into my cultivation, I lent most of my savings to my husband’s younger brother for his house renovation and furniture. I also lent money to his older brother so he could buy a house. On top of that, I lent money to his two brothers for their business venture. I kept my money in a short-term savings account so that I could help them out whenever necessary. The loans weren’t repaid for many years.
My mother-in-law continued being hostile toward me. One time, she spread rumors about me to my face. I couldn’t control myself and lost my temper with her. She seemed so morally corrupt that I felt she didn’t even deserve to be called a human. For a while afterward, I felt no compassion towards her. Even though I looked inward and studied the Fa, I wasn’t able to completely get rid of my deep-seated resentment towards her.
Many practitioners’ sharing articles on Minghui.org about eliminating resentment discussed ways to improve the relationship with one’s mother-in-law. Since my mother-in-law was neither ill nor in distress, I couldn’t do much to move her with kindness. She must have had a grudge against me from our past lifetimes, so in this life, she was one of my relatives so I could save her. Fa-rectification is coming to an end and I was getting anxious.
Master saw my anxiety and helped me. One night, I couldn’t fall asleep so I started reciting Zhuan Falun. When I got to the sentence, “The entire human society is on the same level” (Lecture One, Zhuan Falun), I suddenly realized that my mother-in-law and I were on the same level. We had the same weaknesses, so what couldn’t I forgive her for? This understanding helped me make significant progress, and my resentment was considerably reduced. However, some bad human notions still lingered.
I later read experience sharing articles on how to find the root causes of attachments. I calmed my mind and remembered how I felt when I first read Falun Dafa books. After careful consideration, I found a fundamental attachment. I judged the goodness of other people with my own standards of how to be a good person, instead of with the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. Since my mother-in-law’s behavior didn’t conform to my standards, I felt she was a bad person. This attachment was blocking my improvement. Once I sent forth righteous thoughts to get rid of it, the resentment that had been as hard as ice melted away.
Resentment Against My Sister-in-law Vanishes
My husband’s sister-in-law often visited my family and paid special attention to my husband. For many years, every time we went back to our hometown, she treated my husband exceptionally well—she sat close to him, served him food, and said nice things to him. Gradually, my husband developed deep feelings for her, and later she tried to influence him to some extent. When I lent her family 100,000 yuan to build their house a few years back, she praised my husband for this kindness.
My husband’s sister-in-law ignored all the help I’d given her family in the past. She not only resented me, but was also jealous of me. She verbally abused me in front of my husband, but the most unacceptable thing was her completely inappropriate behavior toward him. This problem troubled me for several years.
Then one night I had a dream. I was sitting on a small cart with a large suitcase on my way home, and my husband’s sister-in-law was pushing the cart. She pushed it very hard, especially when we had to cross a deep, wide ditch. When I woke up, I realized that Master was hinting that she was helping me improve. But I still felt resentful, given her inappropriate behavior.
I have cultivated diligently. After letting go of my resentment, I felt compassionate towards her, because she was lost in the world. On New Year’s Day in 2025, she was surprisingly enthusiastic to see me and greeted me warmly.
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Category: Cultivation Insights
