(Minghui.org) My mother lived in the countryside. She was kind and upright and had a sense of justice. Because she had a difficult life, she was also hot-tempered and strong willed. Her father passed away soon after she finished primary school, so she had to drop out of school and work as a community-funded teacher.
My father’s family inherited some land, so during the Cultural Revolution he was persecuted for being a landlord. My mother was implicated and lost her job. Most village women were illiterate at that time, but my mother had some education and was very capable. She joined the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) and became the village cadre after the Cultural Revolution ended.
Because my mother’s life was so difficult, she was very strict with my brother and me, and she frequently beat us. She had high expectations for us—she pressured us to study diligently and be successful.
She didn’t try to stop me when I began practicing Falun Dafa when I attended university. But after the CCP launched the persecution in July 1999, she was misled by the propaganda and started to oppose Falun Dafa. I tried to explain what Falun Dafa is, but when she refused to listen I quit talking.
I read what Master said about the importance of helping people withdraw from the Party. I also read practitioners’ articles about their experiences, so I understood how significant this is. However, due to my emotion and human attachments, I was unable to talk to her about quitting. I felt there was plenty of time and I would have more opportunities. She had surgery for her stomach cancer and when she had a relapse the following year, I realized her time was limited and I couldn’t wait.
I still feared and resented her because she was so strict with my brother and me, and often beat us when we were children. I even hated her. My parents always quarreled due to the pressure and hardships they faced, so the atmosphere in our home was tense. As a child I felt inferior and insecure. As an adult when I felt the atmosphere wasn’t right or people weren’t friendly, I didn’t speak.
Master asks us to help him save people and to not pick and choose who we talk to, but I did. I forgot that all people came for the Fa. I didn’t have enough compassion. I was anxious when I clarified the truth about the persecution to my mother. I wanted her to practice Falun Dafa. I didn’t put myself in her shoes and I failed to find out what prevented her from quitting the CCP.
My mother was smart and ambitious, but fate didn’t give her any opportunities. She suffered a lot during the Cultural Revolution, so she had high expectations for her children so they could achieve what she hadn’t. Most Chinese parents are like her. They feel "good when their children succeed. My mother was not happy when I started practicing Falun Dafa. I listened to her about almost everything except practicing Falun Dafa. She didn’t say much. But, after the CCP began persecuting Falun Dafa, she worried about my safety. She said that whenever she heard me say the words Falun Dafa she didn’t want to listen.
I still wanted my mother to learn the truth and even practice Falun Dafa, so I asked Master to strengthen me. I lived near my parents, so whenever I had time, I went to their home to cook and clean for them.
My father did not know how to cook, so I cooked delicious food for my mother. She was very happy whenever I came and told my father that she didn’t expect her two sons to be so good to her.
My Mother Gradually Changes
My mother was actually a good person. Even though she was bad tempered, she was honest and had a clear sense of right and wrong. I hadn’t said much to her about the persecution before, but when I began visiting, I told her a lot. I assured her that I would be careful and I explained that Master protects practitioners so she shouldn’t worry. She no longer objected to my practicing Falun Dafa, and she began listening when I told her how practitioners are persecuted.
I gave her some Falun Dafa materials and experience-sharing articles. I showed her the positive reports about Falun Dafa that were published in China before 1999 and articles that explained the facts about the CCP’s persecution. She was indignant after she learned the truth. She said that former CCP head Jiang Zemin, who initiated the persecution, was bad and the CCP was wrong. She told me about the CCP’s crimes during the Cultural Revolution.
I helped my parents withdraw from the CCP and its youth organizations and asked them to say, “Falun Dafa is good, Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good.” My mother’s mindset began changing, and she thought about the meaning of life. She asked me if Heaven really existed and if Falun Dafa was real. I looked at her with compassion and explained that Heaven indeed exists and Falun Dafa is the highest Buddha Fa. She said, “Yes, I believe it.”
I asked her if she wanted to practice Falun Dafa. Her face changed, her eyes shone, and she said she did.
Because my mother had difficulty standing, I felt it would be hard for her to learn the exercise movements, so I asked her to start by reading Zhuan Falun. My father listened to the recordings of Master’s lectures. They watched attentively when I demonstrated the exercises.
I knew Master extended my mother’s life. She burned incense to Master to show her respect. When she said she hoped her illnesses would be cured if she practiced Falun Dafa, I did not correct her. I asked her not to be attached to any physical changes and just follow the course of nature and study the Fa. She listened to me and kept reading Zhuan Falun. I cooked and cleaned the house. I hosted relatives and friends during the day time, and I studied the Fa, did the exercises, and sent forth righteous thoughts at night. Even though I slept little, I didn’t feel tired.
My mother read Zhuan Falun twice. When she was unable to read, I knew her time was coming. She told me that she didn’t cry when I was there, but she cried after I left. I knew I should take good care of my parents and offer them an opportunity to obtain the Fa.
I felt my mother’s crying showed that her knowing side was very grateful to Master and Falun Dafa. She knew that I was genuinely good to her. She suffered a lot in her lifetime and she felt fortunate to obtain the Fa before she died.
I wept after I closed the door the last time I visited her. My knowing side knew that it was the last time I would see her. I stood outside the door with tears streaming down my face.
My brother called me a few days later and said she was dying and urged me to come quickly. When my brother and I arrived, our relatives and friends were waiting for us. My mother was in bed. When I said her name, two lines of tears streamed down her face. I talked to her in a low voice and helped her close her eyes.
My cultivation state wasn’t good for a long time after the funeral. I felt sick, heavy, and muddle-headed. Even when I meditated, I had a lot fear and I felt death was pressing down on me. I had a similar feeling while I looked after my mother. For two months, I focused on studying the Fa, doing the exercises, and sending righteous thoughts. One day while I was sending righteous thoughts, I suddenly felt light, and my mind became clear. I heard my mother say, “Thank you for suffering so much for me!”
