(Minghui.org) In my area, truth-clarification material production sites have blossomed like flowers everywhere, and the materials produced are of high quality and wide ranging.
Unfortunately, a lot of practitioners don't know much about equipment maintenance. It seemed that whenever a printer had so much as a slight malfunction, they would seek help from the practitioners with technical skills.
So, for a period of time, I became responsible for helping practitioners resolve simple technical problems and locate someone to repair printers. When people informed me their printers were not working, I would ride my bicycle and pick them up, one by one, and return them after they were repaired.
I was extremely busy then. I thought to myself, I am a Falun Dafa disciple, so long as it is something to do with Dafa, I will do it regardless of how difficult and troublesome the matter will be.
Yet in the course of events, I gradually realized that it was not just a matter of repairing equipment, but a process of cultivation.
Looking Within Whenever I Had Feelings of Resentment
Practitioner A and I arranged to meet and go to practitioner B's home to pick up a printer. However, we were held back, and by the time we arrived at B's place, it was already dark.
B asked us sternly, “Are you tired?” We replied no. He retorted, “I'm tired. I waited three hours for both of you.”
After taking the printer, I asked A, “How do you feel after hearing what B said?” She answered that she wasn't upset at all. In comparison to her generous heart, I recognized my shortcoming of being resentful. I started to look within myself. Three hours is indeed a long time, and we did not think of B's feelings. I wanted to improve myself in this regard.
I took the printer to the technician and by the time I got home, it was nearly 10 p.m. I had dinner and reflected on what happened that day. I discovered that my feelings of resentment had vanished. Master had removed it for me.
After the printer was repaired, I contacted practitioner B and asked him when I could return it. He said, “Leave it at your place. I'm not free for the next few days.” He added that he would send me a message to let me know when I could return the printer.
I started to get annoyed and thought: “You were anxious when the printer needed to be fixed. Now that it is fixed, you are in no hurry to use it, and I have to keep it for you. Why can't you think of others?” I instantly nailed down my feelings of resentment and eliminated them.
Other tests followed. Practitioner B told me he wanted to use the printer. I was involved with a project and asked him to contact another practitioner instead. He said he could not get hold of that practitioner and was very anxious. In the end, I had no choice but to take the printer to him myself.
The bus had stopped running, and taking a cab cost around 40 yuan. I went to put the printer on my bicycle, and my whole arm was stained with black ink. I understood that this interference occurred so that I would resent practitioner B and refuse to deliver the printer to him.
Well, I knew harboring that attitude wouldn't work, so I resolved to deliver the printer. I brought the equipment to the arranged meeting place. Yet B told me I had to walk further north. I thought to myself, I must cultivate my patience, hand him the printer, and not think or feel anything.
I succeeded in giving B the printer without any complaints. On the way home, I felt lighthearted. I knew I had made progress on this point.
Finding My Own Shortcomings When I See Others' Shortcomings
Practitioner C is an elderly woman who was very diligent when it came to clarifying the truth to people in public. She carried loads of materials in a rickshaw and went to crowded places to distribute them. She downloaded the materials, printed them out, burned DVDs, and made cards and amulets with messages about Falun Gong.
Whenever she encountered problems with her printer or computer, she would call me for help. Upon arriving at her place, however, she would spend time complaining about other practitioners. I tried to tell her that there must be a misunderstanding, but no matter how I shared my understandings with her, she did not change. I began to ponder why she kept complaining to me.
I recalled Master's teachings:
“When any conflict arises or anything happens, I've told you that not only should the two parties in the conflict look for reasons on their part, even any third party should think about himself--why are you the one who observed it?” (“Teaching the Fa at the 2004 Chicago Conference”)
Master also said,
“For a cultivator, looking within is a magical tool.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2009 Washington DC International Fa Conference”)
I asked myself: “Do I have the same problem?” There must be a reason for this. I discovered that I had preconceived notions towards a coordinator and did not resolve the problem. I chose to talk about the matter with others privately, instead of sharing my understandings compassionately with that coordinator directly. So I was wrong and not acting in accordance with the Fa. When rectified my problem, I noticed practitioner C stopped complaining to me about other practitioners.
Once again, I realized there are no small things in cultivation. Everything happens for one to improve their xinxing.
Looking Within Amid Conflicts
We had stopped printing Minghui Weekly in our area, and I considered taking on the responsibility. With the help of other practitioners, I took up the role of editing our local edition. So I started learning the basics, and when I ran into a problem I could not solve, I sought the help of other practitioners.
At the same time, I took care to eliminate the long-standing influence of Communist Party culture in the content produced. My work was reviewed and published by the Minghui editors. As my confidence grew, I started to become more and more independent.
Just as I was feeling confident at what I was doing, one night, practitioner A asked me to go to his home. I went there at once, and an embarrassing incident occurred. He said, “Practitioner D wants to talk to you,” and left immediately.
Practitioner D said he learned that I wrote about the persecution he suffered in Minghui Weekly and that these reports were handed out to the public. He was afraid of being subjected to further persecution and hoped that I would stop doing this.
I got upset and became defensive. I said, “I saw the incident reported on the Minghui website and used it in our local handouts. I was wrong not to have spoken to you about it before using the article.” However, he went on and on about what I did.
I was very unhappy with practitioner A, who led me into this situation. I felt betrayed by him and decided to stop working on the project. I went home with deep resentment in my heart. For over a month, I did not write anything. We stopped printing the weekly paper. During this time, I tried in vain to find someone to take over my duties.
Through studying the Fa repeatedly, I realized that I was wrong. Isn't this an opportunity for me to improve my xinxing? I'm doing such a sacred thing. If my human attachments were not exposed, how can I do better? How can I cultivate? I must continue to write articles for Minghui Weekly, expose the evil, and help save more people.
At present, I still struggle with my human notions at times and have so many attachments to get rid of. I now realize that there are no small matters in cultivation. Everything happens to me for a reason. Only when I use this magical tool of looking within myself, am I truly practicing cultivation.
Now I do what I am supposed to do in a steadfast manner. When I write articles for Minghui Weekly and things don't go smoothly, I would promptly reflect upon my mindset. Do I have any human attachments holding me back? Are there any Fa principles I'm not clear on? When I find something, I immediately rectify it, and this is an improvement.
In cultivation, we are constantly purifying ourselves, walking out of our human state and moving towards divinity.
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