(Minghui.org) I'm a new practitioner who started practicing Falun Gong in June 2013. After cultivating solidly for the past two months, I really feel that I have changed, and I am able to clarify the truth with ease.

Through my own experience I was able to understand this paragraph by Master:

“If every one of you can understand the Fa from the depths of your mind, that will truly be the manifestation of the Fa whose power knows no boundary—the reappearance of the mighty Buddha Fa in the human world!” (“Cautionary Advice” in Essentials for Further Advancement)

Noticing My Shortcomings

I opened a store at a night market in April this year, and I talked to my customers about Falun Gong every day.

Then, around June 10, I felt uneasy and a kind of invisible pressure the moment I thought of clarifying the truth. I didn't want anyone to enter my store. I was remorseful and blamed myself when I couldn't talk to them about Falun Gong. I could still clarify the truth to one person at a time, but not more than one. Even when I encountered people at other places, I didn't dare mention Falun Gong.

Although I didn't lose my temper when my customers were very picky, I still complained about them. Often, I could not help but lash out at my husband when he started saying nasty things and I hit our son when he was noisy.

I felt that other practitioners did very well when they followed Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance to do things. I did not understand what it meant when practitioners mentioned in their articles to "study the Fa with their hearts." At that time, I could not understand Master's lectures on cultivating based on the Fa and wasn't clear that we should validate the Fa and not ourselves.

I began studying the Fa a lot and read many experience sharing articles written by practitioners, so that I could be reminded of the dire consequences of my attachments. I then had a clear idea of what to do.

I understand that cultivation is recognizing attachments and human notions so that they can be eliminated or reduced. So that I could cultivate better as soon as possible, I was determined to pay attention to my every single thought.

Eliminating Attachments and Human Notions

I started to cultivate better beginning in mid June. Many things were impossible at first, but I enlightened to them slowly as time went on.

I was very sleepy and had a hard time waking up at 5:30 a.m. I wanted to sleep a while longer. I began thinking of this sleepiness as a pile of disgusting black and white worms. (This was a practitioner's description of the various attachments that manifest in other dimensions in the article “My Cultivation Experience in Fa Study and Sending Righteous Thoughts”) It was using the false appearance of “comfort” to control me. I got up immediately. The article also helped me eliminate my attachment of lust. When the attachment of lust surfaced, I treated it as a pile of feces and maggots.

I woke up my child at 8 a.m. but he refused to get up, crying and kicking. I knew that this was directed at my attachment of anger and was helping me to eliminate my karma. I kept reciting,

“... karma was there, she was helping him remove it. But he would not accept it and started a fight with her. The karma thus could not be eliminated.” (Lecture Four in Zhuan Falun)

I went grocery shopping at 9 a.m. As I was choosing vegetables, I looked at myself to see if I was attached to looking for what was least expensive and picking only the good items. When doing housework, I examined every thought and eliminated the attachments when I found them. Initially, there were a few attachments in each thought.

I eliminated all distracting thoughts first before studying the Fa in the afternoon. But the attachment of being bored while studying the Fa often surfaced, and I could not overcome it.

Later, I thought of the true selves of Dafa disciples and how the purpose of coming here is to assimilate to the Fa and help Master to rectify the Fa. Moreover, “Different Levels Have Different Fa” (Zhuan Falun): how could I feel bored reading the book? I should love reading the Fa from my heart, because I will elevate each time I study the Fa.

Reading the Fa is different each time. Not wanting to study the Fa was not the true me. I had to remove the false “me” that was bored with studying the Fa first and then calm my heart to study the Fa.

After removing the false “me,” I realized very quickly that there will always be new understandings each time I study the Fa, and, sometimes, every word goes into my heart. There is also the feeling of being surrounded by energy just like doing the exercises, and the more I read, the more I love reading [the Fa].

I open my store at 4 p.m. When customers come, I recommended products to them and at the same time removed my attachment to material benefits. My heart should not be moved whether the customers buy something or not. If there is time, I clarify the truth to them.

Speaking of clarifying the truth, many more attachments surfaced: I found it difficult to open my mouth, I was afraid the customers wouldn't listen, I was afraid of being laughed at, afraid of wasting my breath if two people came in together and one of them didn't want to listen. I have to eliminate these attachments. When I feel that it is difficult, I use my true self to conquer the attachments and let my true self become bigger. When I think of Master's Fa, I feel that I'm slowly getting bigger and the attachments are slowly becoming smaller.

I close my business at 10:30 p.m. and then look at the list of those whom I have helped quit the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) and its affiliated organizations. Initially I thought, “How many people have I persuaded to quit the CCP today?” I later realized that this reflected the attachment of selfishness, so now I ask, “How many people quit today?” I should only feel happy that sentient beings are saved.

Some practitioners may think that it is very difficult to do the above. In fact, I did this naturally and tried my best. The main thing is to assimilate into the Fa at every moment that I am clear-headed. Then there will be the power of Dafa.

When I study the Fa every day, I can recognize which attachments have to be eliminated at my current level. When I feel that it is difficult to eliminate them, I have to know that this attachment is responsible for the false appearance of uncomfortable weakness. I have to eliminate them. If I still can't do it, it is because my true self is not strong enough. I have to study the Fa more to make it stronger and finally overcome the attachment. Each time I want to do this but feel that it is difficult, I know that this is a human notion.

It was almost 10 p.m. in early July and I was feeling tired. I looked towards the door and hoped that someone would come into the store so that I could save one more person. At that moment, I suddenly realized that I was not afraid of clarifying the truth anymore.

Later, it rained for two days and I used the time to study the Fa at home. On July 7, I realized that more people are choosing to quit the Party than before and that I can clarify the truth more easily. I no longer feel uneasy the moment I think of clarifying the truth. The invisible pressure has become a lot less.

I recalled Master's Fa again:

“...and back then I had other ways to handle coldness. This is what I'd think: 'You're cold, and you try to make me cold--are you trying to make me freeze? I'll be even colder than you, I'll make you cold.' (Audience laughs. Applause) Or, 'You're trying to make me hot. I'll turn it around and make you hot--so hot that you can't stand it.'” (“Explaining the Fa During the 2003 Lantern Festival at the U.S. West Fa Conference”)

I suddenly enlightened that I should be confident and poised while clarifying the truth. If people refuse to listen, it's because they do not have a conscience and they should feel ashamed. I should not be the one feeling embarrassed.

On July 25, I first sent forth a strong thought before I clarified the truth in my store: "I'm doing the most righteous thing in the whole universe. I'm telling you (sentient beings) something that is best for you and I am using my greatest compassion to save you. I am confident and poised and unashamed."

When I next clarified the truth, the invisible pressure that was always beside me had completely disappeared. I felt very relaxed. I talked about Dafa easily and naturally to my customers. They listened very attentively, and those who refused to listen were embarrassed and quickly left.

I will remember that thought when that feeling of pressure surfaces again. Sometimes I feel very relaxed even before I finish reciting those words. Later, it occurred to me that this should be used in conquering attachments. I thought, “I am an upright and noble Dafa disciple. Why should I be afraid of attachments? I'm not afraid of you. Instead, I will come looking for you.” When attachments appear, I first look on it kindly and then eliminate it easily.

Xinxing Tests

I can clarify the truth anytime now, naturally and easily, just like chatting with people. I feel bad for those who do not listen to the truth and for those who listen but do not quit the CCP. Occasionally I feel that it is because I did not explain things well enough that the person couldn't be saved.

I have yet to encounter anyone who is rude or says bad words. Although what I have to say is very simple, every word comes from my heart, and the majority of the people who listen withdraw from the Party, and many of them have thanked me.

I can pass all the everyday big and small tests easily. I study the Fa, read Master's recent writings, and read practitioners' experience sharing articles on the Minghui website every day.

Occasionally, when the words touch my heart, it is just like doing the exercises where a strong energy surrounds me. Sometimes, each and every word goes into my heart and their meanings are different each time I read them. There are new understandings, and I feel that I am elevating every day.

I smile easily now when my husband says bad things. I take everything in everyday life lightly now, and my every thought is on Dafa. Of course, each time the part of me that has been fully cultivated is separated, my state will not be good when I wake up the next day. However, it will get better after a day or two of studying the Fa.

Practitioners who have seen my state may think that I have a lot of willpower. In fact, compared with many practitioners, I don't have much at all. I can only sit with my legs in the lotus position for 40 minutes, which says a lot about my willpower.

Before mid June, I knew that I had many bad attachments, but I didn't have the willpower to eliminate them. At that time, I felt that it was really too difficult to follow Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance to do everything. Practitioners may think that I have good enlightenment, but when I read Zhuan Falun, I did not understand the content. I relied on prophecies, believed that Master should be the Lord Savior, and saw that Falun Gong had spread worldwide, which made me think that there must be something remarkable about Falun Gong.

Maintaining a Good Cultivation State

I have improved for two reasons: First, I study the Fa more. I use all my available time to study the Fa, and I am on the Fa at every moment. When attachments interfere with me and I cannot open my eyes, I have to study the Fa. I am like a person who is hungry and has no strength. I have to think of studying the Fa a little more and slowly everything will change.

Second, I believe in Master and the Fa. In the beginning, I used human perspectives to look at Dafa and there were doubts. On the other hand, I felt that Dafa was right and was a righteous Fa.

One day, I saw this sentence while studying the Fa,

“Therefore, the master will tell it: 'You should practice hard here. I’ll be away and come back in a short while. You wait for me.'” (Lecture Eight in Zhuan Falun)

I was suddenly in tears. I realized that it is not easy to be Master. I know how difficult it is and how much Master has suffered to save us. At the same time, I felt ashamed for not trusting Master. I resolved to believe in Master and the Fa 100 percent, so I have to negate and quickly eliminate any thoughts that do not believe in Master and the Fa. I will only continue with my tasks on hand after I have make myself believe 100 percent in Master and the Fa.

Yet Another Attachment

The attachment to thinking that "I cultivate better” has always interfered with me greatly, but I did not know how to remove it. I even thought that this was true.

In “To the European Fa Conference” in The Essentials of Diligent Progress Vol. III, Master mentioned the attachments that students have. I thought that I did not have any of them, and that I cultivated better than they.

When this thought appeared, I felt that something was wrong. I wondered, “How should my true self think?” “Humble” appeared in my mind. I deeply understand the state of being humble. It is a deep sense of being solid, very calm, very stable, and very steadfast. I was scooped up out of hell by magnificent Master and cleansed by Dafa. Everything that I have are all given by magnificent Master and Dafa. Thinking of cultivating better than others is looking at things from the perspective of an ordinary person and is a ridiculous human attachment.

I can now see how fellow practitioners do well when I read the articles and I'm also able to see my shortcomings. Although the attachment of thinking that "I cultivate better” often surfaces, I can now identify it and eliminate it each time.

On August 9, I recalled the way I used to look at those veteran practitioners who have cultivated for dozens of years and yet still have a pile of attachments. They asked Master's help for trivial things, and I really felt that they failed to live up to Master's requirements.

However, when I thought of these veteran practitioners again, my point of view changed completely. I see that they are dragging this heavy burden of human attachments and yet still moving forward. They've encountered many tribulations and troubles on their paths. They are tired and suffering, yet they have not given up on Dafa. That willpower and their steadfast belief in Dafa is very precious. It is really very admirable that they have continued to this day.

When I thought of this, waves of warm currents went through my whole body and it lasted for a few minutes. I know that I have to conquer the attachment of thinking that "I cultivate better.”

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Category: Improving Oneself