(Minghui.org) I am 64 years old and I started to practice Falun Dafa in 1997. I would like to share my experience of dealing with a series of conflicts with my neighbor, while adhering to the Dafa standards.
Forbearing the First Time: Construction Troubles
I bought a piece of land to build a home in the 1990s. One of my colleagues had already bought a piece of land to the west of mine and had his home's foundation built. The seller asked me to buy my property from the foundation of my colleague’s residence.
“We will be neighbors in the future,” I said. “It is better to leave a space, say four meters, between our residences so that we can both have access. This way, it will be more convenient for us to complete maintenance on our homes.” The seller agreed with me and a four-meter space was left for public access.
In the spring of 1996, after my residence was built, I planted a row of trees for shade two meters away from the West wall of my house. One day, a woman came to see me and demanded to know who planted trees on her land. I didn’t know her, but I was later told that my colleague had sold his land to her.
Her family started to build a house on that piece of land two years later.
I came home from work one day and found that, without consulting me beforehand, her family had connected her water pipe to mine.
Given my workplace's regulations, water is not allowed to be channeled into a residence if the owner is not an employee of my company.
Recalling her fierce expression when she first came to my house, I thought, “I should put up with it! We are neighbors now. Since she had difficulties having her water pipe connected, I should help her as I am a practitioner.” I calmed down.
During the construction of her home, sand and small stones blocked a drain outside my house.
I worried that the rain water would not drain smoothly. I told her not to block the drain. She replied, “The drain near your wall is on my land.” I was shocked by what she said!
To prevent land boundary disputes, I asked our village leader and my neighbor's husband to sign a clear land boundary agreement by inviting them to a restaurant for dinner. We lived in peace with each other, for a short time.
Forbearance the Second Time: Tolerance
Her house was soon built. One evening, a large group of people came to her home, saying that the land where my drain had been installed was hers. I didn’t say anything to them, since an agreement had already been signed between us. To my surprise, the group of people returned the next day and uprooted all of my trees and then replanted them on her property.
She then dug a foundation next to my drain to build an enclosing wall that would shade a large portion of our windows.
Understanding that her family was not at all reasonable, I advised my family members not to argue with them in order to avoid disastrous consequences.
I later asked one of our village officials to coordinate our issue, but he said, “Her elder brother is the party secretary in our village. Who dares offend her? Even those who are good at trimming their sails say something in her favor!”
I thought of what Master said:
“We therefore believe in following the course of nature. Sometimes, you think that something should be yours, and others also tell you that it is yours. Actually, it is not. You may believe that it is yours, but in the end it is not yours. Through this, it can be seen whether you can give it up. If you cannot let it go, it is an attachment. This method must be used to get rid of your attachment to self-interest. This is the issue. Because everyday people are not enlightened to this principle, they will all compete and fight before profits.” (Lecture Seven in Zhuan Falun)
I thought, “Is what Master said targeting my attachments? If I don’t listen to Master and I fight with them, the consequences will be disastrous!” I quickly calmed down. Thank you Master once again!
Forbearance the Third Time: Endurance
Just as Master said:
“But normally when a problem arises, if it does not irritate a person psychologically, it does not count or is useless and cannot make him or her improve.” (Lecture Four in Zhuan Falun)
Although I had calmed down, I still held resentment in my heart. I thought that this situation shows that I am weak and incompetent.
At a meeting, the leader of my workplace said, “In which schools of cultivation do you practice tolerance like this?” Someone else said to me, “You have become numb and foolish because of practicing Falun Gong.”
Her enclosing wall was built so close to my home that one of my rooms has become very damp causing a layer of the internal wall to peel off. She also set up a long shed inside her enclosing wall, which splashes rainwater onto our windows. She raised chickens to the east of the shed. And to the west, she raised a dog.
When it was very hot, her chickens' feces and her dog’s urine emitted terrible smells. We had to close our door and windows every day. When she washed her dog, the dirty water would sometimes flow right to our door. When my children and grandchildren came home, they would ask to close all the windows and doors.
I often told my family members that I understood from the Fa that I had probably harmed her and her family in a past life, and in this lifetime I had to repay the debt. I also thought, “Master wants me to improve my xinxing.” So I endured, and my whole family endured.
Tolerance Resolved Issues
Master said,
“...when you take a step back in a conflict, you will find the seas and the skies boundless...” (Lecture Nine in Zhuan Falun)
After my xinxing was upgraded, the situation underwent subtle changes. She killed her dog and moved the chicken coop away. Her husband had previously pretended not to hear me when I said hello to him, but he started to accept the Falun Dafa truth-clarification calendars we gave him. We have been living in peace with each other for nearly 20 years.
No wonder people in ancient China regarded the character for “tolerance” as a very lofty one, as it is composed of a knife above the heart. This is the tolerance practiced by ordinary people.
Master said:
“There is sacrifice in forbearance. Being able to make sacrifices is the result of improving in one’s cultivation.” ( “Non-Omission” from Essentials for Further Advancement)
“To endure completely without anger or grievance is the forbearance of a cultivator.” (“What is Forbearance (Ren)?” from Essentials for Further Advancement)
I have deeply experienced the greatness of the universal law!
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Category: Improving Oneself
