(Minghui.org) I started practicing Falun Dafa when I was 12. I remember that spring day as if it was yesterday. My mother took me to visit my grandma. At her home, I met another visitor, whom I call "Uncle." Uncle is a Dafa practitioner, and he has helped my mother during her cultivation. He encouraged me to also practice Dafa.
I had a dream soon after: I was walking along a busy street. At the end of the street there was a building that was so high that I could not see its top. I was climbing up the building. When I almost reached the top, a kind young man who was standing on the roof gave me a hand.
He pulled me up and told me to look down. I looked down and saw that the busy street below was no longer there. It had become an ocean of black water. I saw that many people were struggling in the water, and then they disappeared.
I told my mother about the dream. She said Master was hinting that I should cultivate in Falun Dafa. I understood that if I did not cultivate, I would be like those people, struggling below in the black water.
Master Oversees Our Cultivation
My cultivation status was not very stable. I wasted a lot of time "having fun." A friend of mine often stayed at my house, and we played a lot. Making matters worse I learned to use the Internet in the summer of 2015; I was then not able to sit down to study the Fa at all.
The situation ended only after my father saw that I was totally off track. He sent my playmate back to her own home and slapped me.
That night I had another dream: I was climbing a high ladder. When I got to the middle, I heard my playmate calling me from the bottom. I then came down to join her.
When I woke up, I knew it was Master giving me another hint. I made a decision to start anew.
There were not a lot of practitioners in my area. Basically, only my mother and I cultivated together. Luckily, Master arranged for Uncle to come once in a while. We were able to discuss our cultivation problems with him.
Improving Xinxing
Whenever I study the Fa well, my heart is full of happiness and compassion. I don't get upset when someone treats me badly. At school, I do not fight back when I'm punched or insulted. One time a classmate said a lot of insulting things to me. Other classmates encouraged me to say something back. I just smiled and shrugged it off.
But sometimes when I do not study the Fa well, my xinxing drops. And I could be easily upset.
I was very upset at my paternal grandmother for a long time. When I was about seven years old, I had lived with her because my parents went to work in another town. She would not cook for me; instead, she demanded that I cook for her. And she even shouted at me when I did not cook well. I really hated her at that time.
After I started cultivating, I still disliked her. Then one day I thought: This is not right because I am a cultivator now. Through studying the Fa, I understood that we might have a karmic relationship. I might be repaying a debt when she treated me badly. I should not be angry with her. Instead, I should treat her with compassion. After I realized all this, I no longer disliked her.
Saving Chinese People
Many Chinese people have been deceived by the Chinese Communist Party’s (CCP's) lies about Falun Dafa. They do not know Dafa is good. After realizing that so many people are in danger, I felt a strong responsibility to help save them.
I often went with my mother at night to distribute truth clarification brochures. I really like doing this, and I feel very honored.
The process of distributing the booklets is also a process for my mother and I to improve. When I see an attachment, I send righteous thoughts to eliminate it.
We were only able to distribute dozens of booklets in one night at first. We could later do several hundred. We were nervous and scared in the beginning. Our only fear now is that we might not have brought enough booklets.
Our initial goal was to distribute all the booklets we brought. We put one on the gate of every house and tried to finish as quickly as possible. We later realized that doing so was not right. If the house had no one living in it, the material we left would be wasted. We then started to pay attention to the houses and checked if there were weeds in front of the gates, or if there was any light inside the homes.
Sometimes we improved during the process. My mother drives an electric bike with me on the back. I hold the bag of booklets. I pass each booklet to my mother, who steers the bike with one hand. One day my mother seemed distracted, and she did not always take the booklets I handed her, so we missed several houses. I was unhappy: what was she thinking? Why wasn't she concentrating? Just then, I remembered we are one body, and I should not complain about her. I immediately sent righteous thoughts and cleaned out my bad thoughts.
Over the past two years, my mother and I covered all villages in the region.We tried everything we could to let more people learn the facts about Dafa. We feel that Master is always with us. Many times we got lost while traveling, but we asked Master for help. We always managed to get on the right road without knowing exactly how we had done so.
It was cold in winter. But as soon as I started to distribute truth clarifying materials, I would not feel cold at all. I knew that Master was protecting me! The nights in the countryside are very dark and quiet. We do not feel scared because we know Master is always with us.
Cultivating Well to the End
Master said:
"There are so many lives that it’s simply impossible to measure or imagine. Sometimes even I am shocked by it. So many beings are watching you intently. Your every single thought and every single action are being watched by countless beings! What I am saying is that a person’s every thought is seen by countless gods! None of them are going to intervene, but all of them are watching, and ultimately they will assess how you, as a being, measure up." ("Fa Teaching Given at the 2014 San Francisco Fa Conference")
Our cultivation is so important!
For a period of time, I could not control myself and watched a lot of TV. I liked TV more and more, and I did not want to study the Fa or do the exercises.
Fortunately, my Uncle came. He told me that he saw in his third eye that I was kneeling, and my face was the color of ash. He knew I must have been experiencing interference and that I was not cultivating well. He told me that in order to save me, Master had to endure a lot of hardship.
I was shocked and felt ashamed. When I was not doing well, I often thought: I'm doing so badly. Will Master still want me? Maybe Master would not agree that I am still his disciple... Now I know I was so foolish. Master never gives up on me. How could I cause Master to worry about me so much? Today's TV is full of bad things. The attachment to watching TV can destroy my cultivation.
I looked inward to see which thoughts of mine gave the old forces the chance to drag me down. I remember that I used to think: It wouldn't be a problem to watch a little bit of TV, would it? It was this thought that provided the evil with the opportunity.
Master said:
"This means that an ordinary person who inhabits this world cannot find himself. And such a notion controls a person for not just one lifetime, but continually onward. Only when a change takes place will it be eliminated. Failing that, it will continue to exert control. When the notion gets progressively stronger, the person’s real self will truly cease to exist." ("Buddha Nature", Zhuan Falun Volume II)
Looking back at the past two years: In the beginning I was diligent in my cultivation, but I later slacked off . Sometimes I was not focused on studying the Fa or sending righteous thoughts. I did not really cultivate myself all the time. For example, I lost my temper from time to time. I still had many human attachments, such as seeking comfort, seeking fame and gain, jealousy, showing off, and being self-centered.
I looked within and asked myself: How much do I really believe in Master and the Fa. Why can't I cultivate myself all the time, like I did in the beginning of my cultivation? Time is passing so quickly, and Fa Rectification is approaching the end. Why am I still attached to things in the human world?
Cultivation is serious! I must correct all my wrong doings. I must align myself with the Fa! So I began to always treat myself as a cultivator, and I learned to have compassion toward others. My mother recently praised me, saying that my temper has improved. I know I still have to improve a lot. I will try my best not to disappoint Master.
I will try to do more house chores so that my mother can have more time to study the Fa. We are one body. We will improve together, follow Master, and return to our true home!
Views expressed in this article represent the author's own opinions or understandings. All content published on this website are copyrighted by Minghui.org. Minghui will produce compilations of its online content regularly and on special occasions.
