(Minghui.org) I observed that some fellow practitioners find it difficult to resolve family related tribulations. Over time, the severity of these tribulations may increase and seriously interfere with their cultivation practice.
Skeptic Witnesses Power of Dafa
Before we married, I tried to tell my husband that I was a Falun Dafa practitioner. When I told him that I practiced Dafa, I saw a spark of recognition in his eyes, although he denied any knowledge of the practice.
I told him that Dafa is a Buddha School cultivation, and how Dafa was slandered through the alleged Beijing Tiananmen Square self-immolation incident.
He remained skeptical, but did not forbid me to practice. However, he asked that I just practice at home and I reluctantly agreed.
At first I was hesitant to practice the exercises where he could see me. However, after witnessing my speedy recovery from serious illnesses through studying the Fa, he began to believe that Dafa was truly powerful. Soon, he was reminding me to study the Fa whenever I felt some physical discomfort. I became confident enough to openly practice the exercises in front of him.
One day, while practicing the "up-and-down arm movement" of the Third Exercise, I opened my eyes and saw him mimicking my arm movements for a while. I suddenly realized that I had to talk to him more about Dafa.
Reluctant Husband Quits the CCP
I was initially afraid to talk to him about quitting the Chinese Communist Party (CCP). After we were married a year, I had recurring dreams of our closely entwined past lives, either as close friends or as a married couple. These dreams bolstered my resolve to bring him close to Dafa.
He loved to watch war movies which glorified the CCP. I knew this would be a major obstacle in my truth clarification efforts, so before each attempt, I would send forth righteous thoughts to eliminate anything that would stop him from accepting the truth.
I explained that Falun Dafa is a righteous cultivation way, and how people in over 100 countries practice it openly. This cultivation practice is only banned in China.
“More than 200 million people have quit the CCP,” I said. “You should quit too! Just use a nickname or pseudonym.” As he seemed lackluster about quitting, I decided to try again later.
My failure to convince him was my fault. Even though I kept trying to persuade him, I was afraid. I increased the time I studied the Fa and sent forth righteous thoughts.
After some time, I again tried, but he did not seem to care one way or another, so I decided to try again in a few days. I continued to eliminate my fear and emotions before I asked him to quit the CCP.
“I’ll quit,” he said. “You've explained the situation to me many times, and I’ll quit. Any alias you pick for me will be fine.”
This time, I knew my husband clearly understood what he was doing. He recently began reading Zhuan Falun with me and had stopped watching the war films.
From this, I learned that relationships with our relatives are reflections of our cultivation state, and any tribulations we encounter are to expose our attachments.
Facing Issue Squarely to Resolve Tribulation
I suggested we distribute some Dafa materials on our evening walk, and he immediately agreed.
Not long after, I brought home 20 Dafa booklets and told him that we could distribute them that night. Unexpectedly he flew into a rage and demanded to know why I kept distributing materials despite the safety risks.
He told me, “You promised you wouldn’t go out to distribute truth clarification materials!”
His behavior stunned, yet enlightened me, at the same time. I mistakenly agreed to not distribute Dafa materials and the old forces were taking advantage of my careless action. My explanation only worsened the situation, and after a huge quarrel, we ignored each other.
Before this, my husband had not lost his temper and we never quarreled. Afterwards, he began to treat me coldly, conveying his disgust and impatience with each spoken word. I became so depressed and miserable that I was unable to get out of bed.
I forced myself to remain rational and search within for my shortcomings. I should not have made that promise. I was blinded by my attachment to enjoying a comfortable life and a loving marriage. I had not treated distributing Dafa materials seriously. Instead I treated it as a nice thing to do while taking our daily walks. Even worse was my attachment to the human emotion of love towards my husband.
I strengthened my resolve and silently promised Master, “I will overcome this tribulation on my own! I will face this issue squarely and ensure everything is resolved.”
My husband’s abnormal behavior convinced me that it was the result of his being controlled by the old forces. I calmed down and although we spoke very little, I tried to ensure that everything I said was truthful and sincere. I also learned to let go of my human attachment towards my husband.
I silently sent forth righteous thoughts towards the evil controlling my husband, “This person is waiting to be saved by Dafa. It is his true self who will decide if Dafa is good or bad. Nobody else should influence his thoughts! Those who dare to interfere and use him to perform evil deeds against Dafa will be disintegrated!”
My still enraged husband rebuked me for going back on my word, refused to listen to my explanation and refused to read the Fa with me. I persisted in explaining the truth to him. I also focused on sending forth righteous thoughts to clear away the evil factors.
Then the tension between us had eased and our conversations became normal. He asked me to swear that I would not go out to distribute truth clarification materials. For this, we could go back to our normal lives and he would continue reading the Fa with me.
I realized instantly that this was a test, to see if I was able to give up my attachment to happiness. I told him that these words were not from his real self and refused to promise anything else.
“I've done no wrong,” I said. “As a practitioner, I have reaped many benefits from cultivating in Dafa. I refuse to be a selfish person who ignores the fate of those people who remain ignorant of the truth!”
Everything returned to normal after three days. He told me that he did not care any longer if I distributed materials. Then, I told him that I would distribute materials today and asked if he would come along.
“I’m not going to help,” he said, “but I can wait for you at the end of the street. You need a ride there, so don’t I have to be your chauffeur?”
By remaining determined this difficult tribulation was quickly resolved!
There is Nothing to Fear
Now, my husband not only reads the Fa with me, but also reminds me about the Fa principles whenever he finds that I have gone astray.
When I was posting Dafa informational stickers, I was suddenly paralyzed by fear, and unable to continue. My husband saw me on his way home and pulled me into the car.
“What is there to fear,” he said. “This attitude is not correct! Ignore those people passing by and don’t be afraid. Nobody would dare to do anything to you. Here, you can stick it on this pipe! I’ll wait while you stick it on!” I stuck a large sticker on the pipe and we drove off.
I learned from my personal experience that if one can adhere to Master’s teachings, family tribulations are easily resolved.
Finally, I would like to quote Master:
“While we are on this subject, I would like to mention something. Some of you have done poorly in clarifying the truth to your families, and that is because you haven't done it right. One reason is that you don't know what their stuck point is, you are unclear on the cause. Another thing is that when you clarify the truth to your family, you always regard them as family, rather than as sentient beings who are to be saved.” (Teaching the Fa in the City of Los Angeles)
“As cultivators, you should all be very clear on this, and you can't be mired in the kind of concept ordinary people have of being related to someone. Regard him as a sentient being and save him as you would any other sentient being. Then when you talk with him, the result will be different--guaranteed. Don't first think of him as family. When you instead talk to him as though he is someone to be saved, it will be different. In reality, the knowing side of his being is aware that, "You and I are family in this life, but in my next life I will be in someone else's family." The core of his being knows this. When you truly have righteous thoughts as you save him, his true thoughts will be able to tell, and he won't be mired in ordinary people's feelings anymore.” (Teaching the Fa in the City of Los Angeles)
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Category: Improving Oneself
