(Minghui.org) I am a post-graduate student from Taiwan, and I currently live and study in the U.S. I began practicing Falun Dafa 17 years ago when I was in elementary school. I would like to tell you some of my cultivation experiences since I’ve come to America.
Clarifying the Truth to People in China
In the past, I tried participating in truth-clarification efforts by making calls to China to encourage people to withdraw from the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) and its youth organizations. But because my Chinese accent is different, sometimes the people in China had difficulty understanding what I was saying. I was fortunate to later learn about the RTC platform’s prerecorded broadcasting project. I only needed to select a message to play and it would broadcast, resolving the issue of my accent.
After undergoing training, I started to broadcast calls. Initially the number of people who picked up and quit the CCP was not very high, but after a few months of persisting I found that people began listening longer and the number of withdrawals also increased. Because of the time difference, I made the calls after the global time for sending forth righteous thoughts in the morning. In the winter, sometimes I did not feel like getting up, but thinking of the people who might have lost their chance to be saved motivated me to persevere. Sometimes it felt like Master was directly encouraging me, as there were times when someone would withdraw from the Party during the very first call of the day.
In the process of making calls, I also discovered that people were more receptive to the truth after I sent forth righteous thoughts, which showed me that the old forces were causing a lot of interference. Sometimes my heart was not that calm while I made the calls, and I would think of other things or have impure thoughts such as just wanting to do things superficially—then the effect of the calls was not that good.
I reminded myself these thoughts were not from me. My intention was to save people and fulfill my vow. Even if I had gaps in my cultivation, I should not be interfered with by the old forces. When I made the calls, even though it was a prerecorded message, I treated it as seriously as doing face-to-face truth clarification, and I sent righteous thoughts to encourage people to learn the truth. Sometimes I would waver and wonder if making the calls was effective, but I would remember what Master said in the Fa:
“Don't overlook any of the things that Dafa disciples do. Your every word, every flyer, every keystroke, every telephone call, and every letter is having a huge impact. Beings that have come to understand the facts become mobile media, and they too clarify the facts. It's had a big impact on society. You, too, have seen the accomplishments and the side of yours that's powerful. So going forward, Dafa disciples should still do these three things: Cultivate yourselves well, clarify the facts, and send righteous thoughts to eliminate the evil.” (“Teaching the Fa at the 2003 Midwest-U.S. Fa Conference,” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. III)
I recently read some practitioners’ experience sharings on Minghui discussing the issue of selfishness, which prompted me to think about why I was making the calls. After digging deep within, I discovered I had a lot of selfishness. When people agreed to quit the Party, I would be genuinely happy for them; but at the same time I would also harbor some selfish thoughts, such as feeling a sense of accomplishment. To some extent, my participation in the project was also out of selfishness. I did not want to be told that I did not fulfill my vows when the Fa-rectification ends. My attachment to self-protection was deeply rooted. It was for saving sentient beings that we left a heavenly paradise, so why was it that I could only think of myself and not about them?
Memorizing and Melting Into the Fa
For a period of time I persisted in memorizing the Fa. When I later became busy preparing for exams, I stopped memorizing the Fa and switched to reading the Fa instead. Afterwards, even though I continuously had the thought of starting to memorize the Fa again, I never did. As I browsed Minghui one day, I read some fellow practitioners’ sharings on how they memorized the Fa. I thought back to my own experiences and wanted to return to the state I was in when I was still memorizing the Fa.
I feel memorizing the Fa allows me to form a deeper understanding of the contents. It’s sometimes easy for me to lose focus while just reading the Fa. As a result, my understanding of the Fa is shallower. I recently started memorizing the Fa again as my main form of Fa study, and I feel it has helped deepen my understanding. One day I memorized this paragraph:
“I once looked into it in some detail and saw that humanity was nearly destroyed eighty-one times. In each episode little of civilization and very few people remained, and they would then enter a new phase, and live primitively, before the population recovered and a new civilization emerged.” (The First Talk, Zhuan Falun)
The phrase “...very few people remained...” seemed to penetrate into my mind, reminding me of Master saying,
“‘only one thousand in ten thousand shall remain,’...”(“Fa Teaching at the 2013 Greater New York Fa Conference”)
When I studied this part of the Fa and thought of the number of people who potentially might be eliminated, I felt incredibly sorrowful. This experience strengthened my resolve to keep making phone calls to save sentient beings.
I have also had some recurring tribulations with sentimentality and found this attachment hard to give up.
Master said,
“With a change in character will come a significant change in your body; physical changes in your body are guaranteed to accompany positive changes in your mind. What will happen is that the bad things that have led you to form attachments will be cast away.” (The First Talk, Zhuan Falun)
While memorizing this passage of Fa, it really felt as if my material field of sentimentality had been removed. I also found I was no longer entangled by sentimentality.
I paid too much attention to relationships between males and females, and I was envious of my roommates who had suitable girlfriends with great qualities. I yearned for that type of loving relationship too.
Master said,
“Any being that falls to this plane should have been destroyed or annihilated. Yet they have been spared by higher divinities who created this special dimension and human world, out of a great sense of compassion. Here, beings are given an additional, mortal body, along with a pair of eyes that are limited to seeing only this material world. So it’s as if these beings are put under a spell of ignorance that prevents them from seeing the universe as it truly is—which is not the case in any other dimension.” (The Second Talk, Zhuan Falun)
While memorizing this paragraph, I enlightened to the fact that people are in a maze and are only able to see the illusions of this dimension. In actuality, these sentimental fantasies are fleeting, and returning to one’s original true self is the true purpose of being human.
Another time while I was memorizing the Fa, I was also undergoing a xinxing tribulation at the time. I held a lot of resentment in my heart, and the feeling that I had been unfairly wronged was pent up inside. As a result I was only able to memorize a very short passage of the Fa; but after memorizing it, all my hatred disappeared and I calmed down. It was as if nothing had happened at all.
It was just like Master said,
“The Fa can break all attachments, the Fa can destroy all evil, the Fa can shatter all lies, and the Fa can strengthen righteous thoughts.” (“Drive Out Interference,” Essentials for Further Advancement II)
Cherishing the Opportunity to Participate in Group Exercises
After I came to the U.S., I began to attend local group exercises frequently. Participating in group exercises was the only opportunity I had to validate the Fa in public. During the pandemic, group exercises also became the only way to have face-to-face meetings with fellow practitioners. The exercise site is a bit of a drive from where I live, but on weekends I try to participate. Sometimes when I had too much pressure from school or other commitments, I did not want to go to the exercise site. But after looking within, I asked myself why I went to the exercise site. Was it not solely to help more people see the beauty of Dafa and to help clarify the truth? This realization encouraged me to persevere.
I cherish every chance I have to attend the group exercises. Every time I participate, it feels as if the cosmic bodies I represent are completely renewed.
The Liberty Bell exercise site is in Independence Square, a national park and the birthplace of America. Both the United States Declaration of Independence and The Constitution of the United States were signed in Liberty Hall. The Liberty Bell was later the very bell that sounded American independence, and since then, it has become a major tourist attraction with visitors from all around the world.
When the weather is good, many tourists line up to visit the bell; and our exercise site is on the grass directly facing the Bell, giving visitors the perfect chance to learn the truth and the goodness of Dafa. While doing the exercises, I remind myself that others are watching us. I need to have my main consciousness stay strong and avoid falling asleep; otherwise, it will have a negative effect on sentient beings’ perception of Dafa.
The Test of a New Environment
When I first came to America, I lived by myself. I later found some roommates and moved in with them. Both of my roommates are Americans and Westerners. One is almost fifty-years-old and the other is around my age. My older roommate really wanted to buy a television and a sofa, and he bought them two months after he moved in. Because my room was next to the living room, the sound from the TV was particularly loud and interfered with my studies and sleep. My ears are sensitive and can discern even very quiet sounds rather clearly while my roommate did not feel that the volume from the television was particularly loud. One time when I asked if he could lower the volume a bit, he became very angry. As the conflict between us grew, sometimes he would holler and shout at me.
After looking within and adjusting my mindset, I found I had fear and was terrified that he might get angry. Sometimes before I fell asleep my heart was still beating very fast. I began to send forth righteous thoughts to eliminate this fear. Perhaps my roommate was helping me to eliminate karma, as Master said:
“You can be sure that whoever your karma is distributed to will feel upset about it.” (The Fourth Talk, Zhuan Falun)
Living with others also made other matters more complicated. For various reasons, I would pay our rent in full each month, and my roommates would later repay me. Sometimes, they had issues coming up with the money and would delay repaying me. I felt a lot of mental pressure as I worried about what I would do if they could not give me the money. I even began having thoughts of moving out. I felt I was still unable to take self-interest lightly.
I would not be able to support us all if they did not repay their shares, but as a cultivator I knew nothing is accidental. Looking within, I discovered that I lacked patience and had a strong attachment to self-interest.
Master said,
“...Not set on profitone is known as humane and righteous...” (“Upright Person,” Hong Yin)
I did not consider the inconvenience it caused my roommates to come up with the funds when I continuously urged them to repay me as soon as they could.
One roommate and I had a dispute during which he pushed my chair to the ground, said some vulgar things and even threatened to kill me. I looked within and wondered why this happened. While I browsed Minghui, I just happened to read some practitioners in China’s experiences about being harassed and threatened by the police, which resonated with me.
This was not the first time my roommate harassed me, and on a certain level it felt like I was like being persecuted. After looking within, I found I had a lot of attachments I had not rid myself of, such as wanting to have a good time, lust, jealousy, hatred, resentment, and selfishness.
I began to pay attention to sending forth righteous thoughts and clearing the unrighteous elements in my field. During this process, I also discovered that I needed to broaden my forbearance and acceptance of others. Fellow practitioners who were persecuted in China still had compassion for their persecutors; but when I was put in a similar circumstance, I only developed hatred. I felt I was far from compassionate. Through the incident, I saw the gaps in my cultivation when compared to fellow cultivators.
Conclusion
When I first came to America, I felt I was more diligent in my cultivation. Every day I would do all five exercises. Perhaps because my environment was rather simple since I lived by myself, as long as I did well in my studies and in doing the three things, it was all I needed to be concerned about. The only big test was the loneliness I faced. I felt as if I was a monk in seclusion within a mountain, separated from the secular world. After changing to a new environment, the temptations and xinxing tests became greater and sometimes I would watch TV or go to the movies with my roommates, as well as go out to have fun. Although my life experiences were enriched, the feeling of urgency I had towards cultivation was diminished. I’ve recently felt that my attitude towards making truth-clarification calls was also not as proactive as before.
Sometimes it feels as if I am doing it just to complete a task, and sometimes I have even used being a graduate assistant and having too much homework as excuses not to make calls. Although it is hard to balance my studies and making calls, I didn't even have the motivation to persist. While writing this article and reflecting on my cultivation during this period, I found a lot of attachments I did not realize I had, and I now cherish more the path I have traveled. I will strive to walk the next part of my path better.
In these seventeen years of cultivation, sometimes I have passed tests well, and other times I have done poorly. Only with Master’s compassionate guidance have I made it to today. If I’ve said anything improper, please compassionately correct me.
Thank you, Master! Thank you, fellow practitioners!
(Presented at the 2021 Online International Young Practitioners Experience Sharing Conference)
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