(Minghui.org) I recently slacked off in my cultivation, so another practitioner suggested I resume memorizing the Fa. I was shocked when I memorized this paragraph,
“Upon falling to this level, they should have been completely destroyed. Out of benevolence and compassion, however, those great enlightened beings decided to give humankind another opportunity in the most painful environment; they thus created such a dimension.” (Lecture Three, Zhuan Falun)
I realized Master gave me a hint: “Another opportunity.” In the past, I only saw the word “opportunity” but did not pay attention to, “another.” I always thought I had plenty of opportunities. I now realize I did not.
My cultivation state was sometimes good and sometimes bad. After I practiced diligently for some time, I took a break. For example, after memorizing a section of Fa, I needed to rest for a while. I needed to rest after reading a lecture. If I studied the Fa and did the exercises for a few days I would rest for two days and sleep. After a few days of rest, I felt the urgency again and worked harder. Then I relaxed again. I knew this was not good for my cultivation, but there was a thought in my mind: I still had more chances. I thought, that as long as I did not give up cultivation, Master (Dafa’s founder) would give me more chances. So I was not anxious when I was not diligent because I thought there were still chances.
Despite the persecution, I always managed to join group Fa study, which pushed me to study the Fa every day. However, during the three years of the COVID shutdown, I spent less time with practitioners and more time on my own, so I slacked off in cultivation. For a while, I even became obsessed with online novels. I sometimes read them for several days until my eyes became dry and painful. I then quickly started studying the Fa. Within a few days, I recovered. After a few months, I began to slack off again. I got attached to my cell phone. I couldn’t put it down for two weeks. I was disappointed in myself. I tried some methods, including deleting the software, replacing the smartphone with an older phone, or leaving the smartphone at work. These helped a little but did not solve my problem.
Seeing I wanted to improve, Master arranged for a fellow practitioner to talk to me. He memorized Zhuan Falun and encouraged me to do so. I memorized the book once in the past, although I was not fluent. This time, I didn’t pay attention to how fast I progressed. I just wanted to calm down and memorize the Fa. Gradually, I saw the reason why I was hooked on my cell phone. First, I mistakenly regarded reading novels as entertainment and rest and felt it was not a big issue. Second, I didn’t treat quitting the cell phone in the same way as quitting drinking. Once you stop drinking, you should not drink again. Yet I was repeatedly interfered with. When I finally woke up, I realized there was such a vast gap in cultivation between diligent practitioners and myself. Our merciful Master has created opportunities for us to cultivate. I did not take Master’s compassion seriously and wasted the time that Master provided for all sentient beings with his huge sacrifices! How can I take the chances Master gave me as excuses to slack off?
Master said:
“Opportunity knocks but once. Once the illusion that you cannot let go of disappears, you will realize what you have lost.” (“Practicing Cultivation After Retirement”, Essentials for Further Advancement)
Looking back on my cultivation, I indulged in my big attachment to seeking comfort. I did not realize I was interfered with by my thought karma. I was counting on the fact that Master would repeatedly give me chances. I may lose the opportunity Master gave to me if I keep slacking off!
Master gave me one more chance, and I shall treasure it, cultivate diligently, and live up to Master’s compassionate salvation.
This is my personal understanding. Please kindly correct me if there is anything inappropriate.
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Category: Improving Oneself
