(Minghui.org) A few years ago, I had a vivid dream that left a lasting impression on me.
In the dream, I was trapped in a large, empty house that was pitch black inside. There was a closed, massive iron door. I was anxious to get out, but the door was too heavy to open. I started shouting anxiously, “I want to get out! I want to get out!” Then, a deep voice came from the depths of the darkness behind me, asking, “What do you want?” The voice annoyed me, so I didn't even turn around or look to see who spoke. I continued looking for a way out and started desperately shouting, “I don't want anything! I want to get out!” Then I woke up.
The dream however, was still vivid in my mind. I felt pessimism and despair. I thought about what the dream was telling me. I understood that I was under the control of the old forces; there must be a significant problem with my cultivation, and the old forces used my omission as an excuse to imprison me. I had a problem that I could not avoid dealing with.
My cultivation path has been challenging. I have experienced a lot of resistance and interference from the old forces, like a shadow that follows me everywhere. I asked myself what were my loopholes that the old forces have seized upon? I searched hard, but after a long time, couldn’t find them. However, I didn’t stop looking.
Whenever I thought about this dream, I felt despair. Significantly, every time I studied the Fa, the despair went away. Dafa repeatedly awakened me from despair and urged me to cheer up and make progress. I knew that Master had not given up on me, a disciple who was not doing well, and was pulling me out of the quagmire. I would often try my best to deny the old forces’ arrangements, constantly strengthen my main consciousness, and firmly follow the path arranged by Master Li.
Gradually, I learned how to keep my every thought in the Fa, and I became more and more proactive in distinguishing which thoughts were in line with the Fa and which were not. Whenever a bad thought occurred, I seized it the moment it appeared, immediately cleared it away with righteous thoughts, and in an instant, the bad thought disappeared without a trace. While denying and rejecting the negative thoughts that arise in my mind, I also strengthen my righteous thoughts, making them stronger and my mind clearer.
In the past, I did not know how to cultivate my thoughts and let negative thoughts flood my mind. I did not know how to deny and eliminate them. Only when things went bad did I look inward to find what went wrong. I cannot count how many tribulations I experienced, big or small, but gradually, I realized the Fa principles that Master taught.
Master told us:
“That doesn’t mean you are acknowledging the ordeals arranged by the old forces and trying to do well amidst the ordeals they have arranged. That’s not the case. We negate even the very emergence of the old forces and everything that they’ve arranged; ...” (“Fa Teaching Given at the 2004 Chicago Fa Conference,” Collected Teachings Given Around the WorldVolume IV)
During this process, there have been setbacks and hard lessons. I have also realized that the old forces will magnify the notions in my mind that have not yet been eliminated through cultivation. When I don’t know how to cultivate my every thought, it is easy to mistakenly think that all thoughts are my own.
For a while, I slackened in my cultivation. I felt that I had too many negative thoughts and was too busy to keep rejecting them. I decided to take a break and ignore them. Without knowing it, this relaxation allowed all kinds of bad thoughts to resurface. I was not vigilant, and I let them flourish. In particular, I did not promptly negate the thoughts of persecution. Instead, I followed them and let my mind wander. Soon, I felt fear in my heart. The fear of persecution soon filled my mind and body, and I felt that everything and everyone around me would bring me persecution.
Realizing that I wasn’t in a correct state, I quickly looked inward. I read all of Zhuan Falun in two days and spent hours sending righteous thoughts to negate the fear in my thoughts. After this, my heart was once again filled with peace.
Looking back at my actions, I realized that I had spent a lot of time on insignificant matters. Every day, I studied the Fa in a hurry, rushed through one lecture after another as if I were rushing through a task. I also sent righteous thoughts less often. By then, I realized that I had relaxed my determination to cultivate to a dangerous point.
I deeply realized the seriousness of cultivation and also felt Master’s great compassion and the majesty of Dafa. I recognized the importance of cultivating my every thought, which means always maintaining righteous thoughts. When a righteous thought is sent out, gong is sent out, which can instantly disintegrate evil. When we cultivate our every thought every day, we are cultivating our human thoughts into divine thoughts, and we are walking on the path toward Godhood.
“For only by letting go of worldly concerns, shall you find the divine path you seek” (“Let Go of Worldly Concerns to Find the Divine Path,” Hong Yin VI) I understand that is how we walk out of the old universe and away from the old forces’ arrangements.
Later, I had another dream in which I was being monitored. When I walked out of a room, the person monitoring me followed me. I realized that I had to fly so he would not dare to follow me, so I flew up, which scared away the person that was monitoring me. Later, I returned to the house that I just left. Soon, I walked out, and I flew up. The people monitoring me were petrified. Feeling exasperated, they said, “Go, go, we don’t want you anymore; we won’t bother you in the future.”
After waking up, I almost rejoiced but immediately realized that I shouldn’t. I didn’t know how much Master had worried about me. Every step forward for a disciple is inseparable from Master’s compassion and hard work and the guidance of Dafa. Otherwise, I can’t even imagine what I would be like today.
I realized that when I walked out of that house, I had learned to cultivate my thoughts and let go of my human mindset. When I flew, I was no longer within the old forces’ arrangements and was out of their control.
When I returned to the house, which the old forces were monitoring, I had slackened off in my cultivation, and the old forces seized the excuse to monitor and persecute me again. Finally, when I was able to strengthen my righteous thoughts and once again flew up, the old forces saw that I was determined and didn’t know what to do, so they let me go.
Master told us long ago:
“Today is Easter, the day of a divine being’s resurrection! (Enthusiastic applause) That’s all I will say today. On this special, glorious day, may Dafa disciples’ divine sides also gain new life!” (“Fa Teaching Given on Easter 2004 at the New York Fa Conference,” Collected Teachings Given Around the WorldVolume VI)
It has been more than twenty years since Master said these words. Master has waited and waited for us to cultivate our divine side. I have let Master down by making him wait for so long.
This is my understanding at my current level; please kindly point out anything inappropriate.
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Category: Improving Oneself
