(Minghui.org) During the Shen Yun performances in 2024, I suddenly realized I had an attachment, which expanded but was hidden for many years. It was resentment. I was a bit shocked but relieved to have found it. In my life I often felt heavy-hearted, even more so after going through big changes in my personal life several years ago, and this attachment seemed to be at the root of it. I felt the attachment was quite solid, as though it followed me around and accumulated over several lifetimes.
At first, I didn’t know what to do. At my workplace, a media project, I was not in a very peaceful state. I was becoming increasingly disheartened and resentful, and irritated by others. Even though I joined group Fa study I realized the quality of my reading was often not good, and I found it hard to keep on top of my personal life. I gradually put completing my tasks at work above my own personal cultivation, and above my family and friends, until it seemed to take over my life. One day, I suddenly noticed that I was putting doing things to clarify the truth above my cultivation in order to feel and look like I was cultivating well.
I wasn’t any better than the person in Zhuan Falun who was happy to get someone else’s illness in order to hold on to their reputation.
I wasn’t sure how to break through this incorrect state. Like a frog boiling in luke-warm water, this happened over time. I thought to myself, it’s my heart that matters the most, not my occupation. It was something I needed to change from within. But I felt trapped and desperate. In my heart, I cried out to Master for help, and felt I couldn’t go on like this any longer. I yearned to have the pure heart I had when I first started practicing cultivation diligently. As soon as I asked Master for help, one word came back to me: “patience.”
In the following months, Master used various tribulations to shatter my resentment, eliminate my karma, and transform my heart. I still had a lot to improve on, but I felt my mindset gradually change to where I could remember the work I did was completely for the good of others, and my heart was filled with gratitude. The turnaround is truly a miracle. Thank you Master.
I experienced many miracles, but I would like to focus on one recent opportunity and how it came about.
“It’s like living in a hotel”
I moved last year, which was sad because I had become good friends with my flatmates. When I first met them just before I moved in, I felt I had known them for a very long time. They were like old trusted friends and I always had someone to talk to.
In contrast my new flat was modern inside, and was cold and not like a home. The room was also much smaller. The area was a bit rough, and sometimes a gang of boys liked to hang out and play rap music outside, and sometimes got into fights. I didn’t see my new flatmate very much, and the other room was rented out to Airbnb guests. While I did feel I was sent there for a reason, I was unhappy. One day at work, I was chatting about the change in my living space with a girl who worked in another office. She laughed, and said, “It’s like living in a hotel.” I agreed and then remembered Master’s words:
“It has been said, “When I come to this ordinary human society, it’s just like checking into a hotel for a few days. Then I leave in a hurry.” Some people are just obsessed with this place and have forgotten their own homes.” (Lecture Nine, Zhuan Falun)
This was a very obvious hint from Master that I was reminded of every day.
The Airbnb guests that rented one of the rooms in the flat were there for a few days or a few weeks. They came and left in a hurry, and we most likely never saw them again—just like the temporary nature of life and relationships.
But it was arranged well. Each guest felt relaxed in the flat, so it was very natural to clarify the truth to them, particularly because of my work at the media. It also made me realize that I’d gradually become too attached to, or even obsessed with, fame, gain, and emotion. I reminded myself that success in cultivation doesn’t relate to what may be seen as successful in the temporary human society. My life is arranged based on my karma, and the key is whether my heart remains clean and righteous.
While the area I was living in was a bit rough compared to where I was before, I was touched by the kindness and resilience of some of my neighbors. One neighbor had been through a lot of hardship in her own life. I heard from another neighbor that she had turned to alcohol some time ago and had to go into rehab. She once told me it was sad that her son had been a recluse since he was a teenager and wouldn’t come out of the house even now when he was in his twenties. Despite all her hardships she always smiled and greeted me, and I could feel her kindness.
Another neighbor told me she cried when she thought of the people and children suffering in the wars in the Middle East. I felt her compassion. She didn’t complain about her own life but was in tears at others’ suffering. Whenever I saw her she always reminded me to look after my mother, and look after my family members.
Room Becomes Available for a 9-day Seminar
Not long after I moved to that flat, I thought that since I was moving to a new area, I should contact the local councilors, clarify the truth to them, and invite them to an upcoming Parliament seminar. So I went online and looked up the emails of the local councilors.
Then a few days later, I got a knock on my door. When I opened the door, to my surprise, it was one of the local councilors who I planned to contact. She said, “I’m just checking how you’re doing with the rise in the cost-of-living.” As we talked, I mentioned the Nine Day Falun Dafa seminar. She said, “Why don’t you hold it here?” She suggested some local spaces and I agreed. She gave me her email and left.
I did not send her an email right away. A week later in a dream, a former British Prime Minister appeared next to me while I was holding a camera. She said to me in a judgmental tone, “Why haven’t you sent me that email?” I was quite relaxed and gave her an excuse saying I hadn’t gotten around to it. She then said, “You need to send me that email.” As soon as I woke up I realized I urgently needed to email the councilor. I was being too slow, and had to be given hints to hurry up. I sent her an email right away.
She responded a couple of weeks later with some venues I could contact. One of the venues happened to be right on my doorstep. When I contacted them, the lady looking after the space was very happy to hear about Falun Dafa and said I could rent it for free. She also said there was a television and speakers. I was amazed at the arrangement. I arranged to play Master’s lecture videos and exercise instruction videos for the attendees over nine consecutive evenings.
Organizing the Seminar
Once the venue and times were fixed, I needed to work on hosting it. The lady who looked after the keys for the space said she hoped the room would be completely full, and questioned whether she would continue opening it up over nine consecutive evenings if there were only one or two attendees. I agreed, but I was a little bit nervous as it was scheduled to start in only three weeks. In addition, my level of trust in other people was low.
A few months prior, a practitioner who I knew well, publicly turned against the Fa. I was very emotional and confused. The next day I met a good friend who was not a practitioner. I did not share with her the news, as she was going through some tribulations herself, but when we said goodbye she gave me a Christmas present. I was surprised to see that it was a perfume called Divinity. I felt it was a hint from Master to stay positive and focused. As I am writing this I also realize it’s a hint to view things from a divine being’s perspective.
Despite reminding myself that each person is responsible for their own choice, I had a small fear that some people coming to the seminar may not be able to accept the Fa. Later I realized that this worry was in a way disrespectful. The Fa is so powerful, and each person has their own predestination and choice. All I could do was to make sure the environment was not disrupted, and I believed the righteous elements would dissolve anything bad. It is up to each individual whether they practice or not.
When I thought about how to organize the seminar, a couple of things came to mind. One was the story in Shen Yun called “Enlightenment” where there was a man who was in a war and killed people. He almost took his own life but decided to become a monk. He was determined to let go of his attachments and succeeded in cultivation, while the other monks who seemed to be cultivating longer couldn’t pass the first test.
This story in Shen Yun helped me understand that no matter what someone has done in their past, if we can provide an opportunity or environment for them to learn about Falun Dafa, they may go on to do very well. We just don’t know what someone’s predestination could be. Another thing I remembered after reading one of Master’s teachings was that illiterate people can organize people to read the Fa. So I felt I didn’t need to feel doubtful about my own depth of understanding, since I will learn along with the others, and that Master is looking after everyone.
I also had some hints that Master was looking after everything. For example, one practitioner messaged me to say that she could help on all days except Friday & Saturday, and at exactly the same time, another practitioner messaged me to say she could only help on Friday & Saturday. So I was really touched by Master’s compassion, showing me that everything was going to be fine. This also made me realize how everything in my life must be intricately arranged.
Learning Along With Others
In the end, 50 people registered to attend the nine days, and around eleven people actually turned up. Three people made it to the end, and 3 to 4 people seemed interested in continuing to practice. The lady looking after the space was away for some of the days so she decided to give me the key to open and lock up.
Most people came after seeing information about the seminar on social media. One person came because he spoke to a practitioner at a site where practitioners tell people about the persecution. I felt touched by each practitioner’s dedication in reaching people, and all the intricate arrangements the heavenly beings must have made for the people who made it to watch Master’s video lectures.
Some people left early, but I felt whether people stayed or went depended on their predestination.
I had some fear about answering questions because of an attachment to saving face and fear of conflict, but in the end I realized that as long as I spoke to people and thought of them first, and talked in a basic way, it was fine. These are attachments I need to work on.
After watching Lecture Two, one person came up to me excitedly and said, “I’ve tried so many spiritual practices, but I’ve never known anything like this. I want to volunteer to help spread the practice!”
This left a deep impression on me. I started to read the Fa when I was around ten years old and I felt that the Fa protected me so I didn’t go along with modern trends. I was around 17 years old when I fully committed to practicing cultivation.
As an adult, I never went through the process of looking for a spiritual practice. Perhaps I had taken for granted how magnificent the Fa really is and what great fortune we have to come across the Fa in this lifetime.
Before watching Lecture Four with the group, I was given a hint in my dream that revealed the emotional suffering I caused others in a previous lifetime. In that moment I felt very bad about the suffering I caused, and I had a deeper understanding of the hardships we encounter in this lifetime. At the same time I was deeply touched to think how Master uses many ways to offset our karma, and a large portion is already eliminated.
Some children came one evening. One girl was particularly keen and wanted to watch Master’s lecture, and she brought her friends.
However one girl in the group who looked be five years old didn’t join in and seemed to have an attitude, and she spoke back at me. One day, she found two long pieces of plastic gutter and she wanted to bring it inside the room. I asked her to stop and she spoke back in a rude way, but then stayed outside. I wondered why she was behaving like that.
I later realized that I was being judgmental. The girl didn’t join the other children to learn the exercises, but when I later gave them lotus flowers she seemed the happiest to get one. She came running into the room a couple of weeks later during a weekly Fa study session that was set up after the seminar, asking about lotus flowers. Before another weekly exercise and study session, she came running in with her friend and decided to arrange some chairs, saying she was going to summon demons. I didn’t understand why. Eventually she didn’t do it and was able to sit in the half lotus position before others arrived to do the fifth exercise. She kept being naughty but I knew that Master would look after her, and maybe I owed her something from another life.
Later I read some Fa which help me realize that numerous rounds of tests are arranged along our paths for us to improve. I suddenly felt grateful for knowing I was on the right path, and for all the different tribulations I experienced in my life so far, even though I stumbled. I finally understood this basic principle.
I recently noticed that there have been more sharings on the Minghui website about fundamental attachments. I asked myself, am I holding on to a hidden pursuit to gain a comfortable life from the Fa? Am I using the Fa for this human goal? I was shocked to find an element of this in my field, where I seemed to have developed a pursuit of gaining comfort and good things through the Fa. This is such an impure attachment to have and I don’t want it to exist in my heart.
During the seminar, when we all watched Lecture Nine together I felt that Master was helping to raise our levels, and I was really touched. I thought about how far people in China traveled to listen to Master lecture in the early 90s. I was very touched. It made me cherish learning with others in person, something I hadn’t felt for some time.
I feel like I haven’t always been able to stay diligent in cultivation, even though I’ve kept going. It really helped me as well to be part of this effort, and it’s made me realize that Master provided so much, and it’s also reminded me that I need to make more effort to stay diligent every day. I found that since being part of the seminar, if it is late in the evening and I missed doing the exercises on that day I make sure I do some exercises. Whereas previously if it was late and I felt tired I would sometimes skip the exercises.
I hope I can truly absorb the Fa, so that I can help more people have a chance to learn about Falun Dafa, and keep a clean and pure mind wherever I am.
Now, when I notice any negative thoughts entering my mind I try to read or recite a Hong Yin poem.
I actually felt a bit embarrassed about writing a sharing, and after writing it I didn’t want to read it out. I was afraid it might not be good enough and that it might not be that beneficial because others cultivated better than me. A practitioner pointed out that this comes from the competitive mentality and I was comparing my cultivation with others. I found it’s another layer of attachment that needed to be exposed so I could let go of it.
I would like to end by saying that I appreciate the opportunity to write this sharing, which has also been a cultivation process. It helped me become more determined and notice many things I need to improve on. Hopefully it will help some others.
Thank you Master. Thank you fellow practitioners.
(Selected article presented at the 2025 UK Fa Conference)
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