(Minghui.org) I started to practice Falun Dafa when I was pregnant and believe my child is very fortunate. However, his education was not going well. When I taught him Pinyin and English, I got very angry when he did not understand. I was surprised that I would act like that.
I was a good employee at work and treated the elders in my family with respect. But when my son did not do as I expected, I was a terrible mother.
I am not one to spoil a child. I said I didn't require him to be number one. But I asked him to be tolerant when dealing with others. When he did not remember what I said again and again, I could not control my temper and screamed at him. I then studied the Fa to find my loophole and would apologize to my son. That happened may times. I still have not dealt with my emotions very well.
Children know nothing when they come into this world. I, however, expected my child to grasp everything I taught him right away. If he did not understand or was slow to learn, I got angry.
I claimed that I did not expect him to be at the top of his class, but that was actually not true. That reflected my indoctrination by the Chinese Communist Party (CCP). The CCP claims that everything is for the people, but in reality, they force the people to serve it.
When I taught my son to recite poems, I was not patient and told him to memorize them quickly. He was upset and started to cry. I got mad and said, “Do you think crying works? Stand up and recite it until you can remember it!”
After trying for one afternoon and one evening, he still could not remember one poem. I looked inward and found that my way of teaching was actually being taken advantage of by the old forces. I was trying to satisfy my own attachment to fame. If he did not perform as I expected, I would punish him. I did not consider his difficulties and truly help him. If I did, I would not punish him and I would try different ways to help him instead.
Righteous Thoughts Develop from Studying the Fa
The old forces act in the same way by inflicting harm and call it “helping practitioners.” They test Dafa disciples’ righteous thoughts by persecuting them. But righteous thoughts cannot be built up through persecution—righteous thoughts are developed from studying the Fa and cultivating Dafa solidly.
Master said:
“Dafa is the wisdom of the Creator. It is the bedrock of creation, what the heavens, earth, and universe are built upon. It encompasses all things, from the utmost minuscule to the vastest of the vast, while manifesting differently at each of the cosmic body’s planes of existence.” (“On Dafa,” Essentials for Further Advancement)
When we get rid of human concepts and change ourselves by studying the Fa constantly, Master will help us eliminate those bad substances.
What kind of attachments follow the old forces’ way of thinking? I used to be very proud if I was the best. When my child appeared to be slow, I could not accept it and got mad at him. Actually, that was my own attachment to fame.
As a Dafa practitioner, when I have such a selfish attachment, I cannot educate my child well, not to mention clarify the truth to awaken people’s consciences. When I lost my temper, I did not help him.
It is the same when sentient beings are controlled by the CCP's propaganda. I would get very upset when I could not convince people they were misled by the CCP. Then I ended up complaining about them. Actually, if I were compassionate, I would calm down and help them analyze the situation with reason. Even if I could not change them, they would at least feel my compassion.
If I didn’t study the Fa well, I believe I would be like other parents and force my child to be among the top in his class. I would expect him to be like an everyday person. So I corrected myself and now educate him by following Dafa’s principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance.
My child’s teacher recently told him, “You are calm and straightforward. You study very hard. You don’t argue, but you have the ability to distinguish right from wrong. You are not talkative, but you understand and help others.”
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Category: Improving Oneself
